Marriage; It is the decision of two individuals whose backgrounds, families, educational backgrounds and cultures are different from each other to spend the rest of their lives together. This brings about some changes in the existing roles of married individuals.
Imago therapy, Dr. Harville Hendrix and his wife, Dr. It is a theory developed by Helen Hunt. Imago theory and relationship therapy began in the late 1970s with Hendrix's question, "Why do men and women have so many problems in their relationships?" It emerged as a result of trying to find an answer to the question: Hendrix answered this question: "What causes our unfinished business in childhood is our tendency to marry individuals with similar personality traits to our parents." He answered. So, when we choose our partners in our adult lives, we tend to choose partners who resemble our parents in order to complete the problems we could not complete in childhood in adult life. In this way, we try to complete our unresolved problems left unfinished in the past through the spouse we have chosen. According to imago therapy, marriage is a great chance for people to complete these problems and heal. He emphasizes that marriage goes through 3 stages in this process.
Romantic Love: This is the stage that brings couples together and enables them to get married or have a relationship. In this phase, couples feel safe with each other and see themselves as more social, smarter and more affectionate. Under the influence of love, individuals subconsciously believe that they have found their ideal imago spouse, that their imago spouse will fulfill their needs that were not met in childhood, that they will reach integrity and realize the ideal marriage.
Power Struggle: The process that occurs with the end of romantic love. It is a power struggle. At this stage, couples do not see each other as a different individual, they force each other to think the same. In this case, couples often decide to divorce. However, even if the marriage ends in divorce, divorce is not actually a solution as the same cycle will continue in subsequent relationships. Couples who have passed the power struggle stage become strong and loyal by going beyond the romantic bond of love that enables them to stand by each other in difficult times. They create a natural bond and solve problems through this bond
True Love: When individuals realize that they chose their spouse to heal their own childhood wounds, they take the first step towards true love. In this stage, couples feel unconditional love for each other without any obligation. Couples who reach true love in this safe area take a step from the unconscious marriage stage to a conscious marriage. Conscious marriage is a romantic relationship in which spouses cooperate to complete each other's emotional needs and support their psychological and spiritual development.
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