Factors such as how we receive love in our childhood, the meaning given to emotions, how love is shown within the family, and temperament determine how we show our love in a relationship. Over time, as people get hurt in their relationships, they stop showing their love. This behavior, adopted for self-protection, creates a great obstacle for people to express their emotions and establish closeness.
People may be afraid of being hurt. However, choosing to show their love helps them experience genuine closeness. Otherwise, fears may prevent a person from truly knowing, bonding with, or showing love to another.
Every person expresses love in at least one way. Sometimes love can be conveyed in more than one way. The important thing is to recognize these ways and include them in our lives. Ultimately, what couples need most is love and closeness.
Couples' love languages may differ. Individuals who do not know each other's ways of expressing love have difficulty understanding each other. This communication problem between couples can gradually grow and become inextricable. Reproach sentences such as 'You don't love me', 'You don't realize my love for you', 'I don't care' begin to arise over time. Individuals who do not know each other's love language may not feel loved and may have difficulty establishing a strong bond. When couples blame each other, criticize each other, or withdraw, it damages the bond between them. An individual who knows his own love language and his partner's love language learns different ways to express emotions and realizes how his partner offers him love, perhaps every day. Awareness of love languages helps couples have a much more fulfilling relationship. So, in what ways do we express our love?
1-Service/Help
Doing something that your partner needs is a way to show love. Many examples such as preparing breakfast, dropping the children off to school, doing the work at the bank can be considered in this context. What needs to be taken into consideration here is that the person feels happy and gladly offers the service to the other person. Otherwise, since he has seen and learned this way until now, he will do it by making sacrifices. The fact that the person uses the service tool because he is trying to hold on to the relationship does not indicate that this is his love language.
2-Gifts
Receiving gifts is also a different way of showing love. Some people buy gifts for their loved ones. This is a way of saying 'I love you'.
3-Spending quality time
Regardless of the activity, just wanting to be with you at that moment, sharing that moment. Wanting to be with someone is also a type of presenting love.
4-Physical contact
Hugging and touching, other than sexuality, are also one of the ways to show love.
5-Appreciation
Appreciating your spouse and approving something he does is another way of telling him that you love him.
We all prefer at least one of these ways. We use it as . While the love language of one couple may be service, the love language of another may be gifts. It is important for individuals to know this. Otherwise, the person who shows his love by buying a gift may interpret his partner's failure to buy a gift as indifference. Similarly, a person who expresses his love by hugging may feel unimportant when his interlocutor does not see it to the same extent. We are all different. The paths we choose are also different. It is always possible to find new ways and make our relationship richer.
So, how do you show your love to your spouse?
Are there any similarities between your spouse's love language and yours?
Your spouse tells you 'You' every day. Could it be saying 'I love you'?
If you wanted to add a new love language, which one would you choose?
Just answering these questions will help increase your awareness.
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