Life may not always be a bed of roses... Your manager is not satisfied with the work you do, the company you manage is struggling to survive, you have an unpleasant argument with the person you love, there are financial difficulties, you do not get enough and quality sleep, you get sick or suffer from chronic pain.
When faced with such situations, we can often find ourselves responding with one or more of the following:
Moving away from the problem: Quitting a job, breaking up with a loved one, or simply not caring about things anymore. Taking any action that will lead to the exit.
Ignoring the problem: Just don't think about it. Acting as if everything is okay. Preoccupying yourself with all kinds of things other than the problem.
Experiencing false relief: Distracting our mind from the issue we are struggling with by resorting to things such as alcohol, cigarettes, overeating, television, social media, games.
Complaining and reproaching: To someone. scolding, complaining all day, holding a friend hostage and telling your side of the story for hours, trying to prove that the problem is with the other person, not you.
All of these methods are things we all do from time to time, which is why we feel guilty and guilty. There's no point in hearing it. Sometimes they can even be both calming and helpful. For example, it's a good idea to tell others about the problems you're having. It's also a good idea to retreat and rest for a while before you start tackling problems.
However, trying to ignore the problem, running away from it, or even trying to comfort ourselves with various methods are only effective to a certain extent. However, perhaps a helpful mindset shift can be made: Seeing problems as experiences rather than problems.
Feel whatever sadness or anger you're feeling to the fullest.
Resolve the problem. Instead of trying to ignore it, try to feel it fully and give yourself permission to do so. Don't hinder yourself.
And while you do this, don't see the issue as a problem that needs to be solved, as something you need to get rid of. Just right now See it as an experience you are having.
This unpleasant situation I am experiencing is not actually a problem. It's an experience.
It's just that: an experience, a feeling. There is nothing to panic. It's just something you're experiencing right now — it's not a matter of whether it's a good thing or a bad thing. Yes, maybe the feeling is not good. It would be okay if it wasn't. But that's not a problem either, because not all experiences are just positive ones, right? Sometimes we have to experience cold, heat, storm and pain even if we don't want to. These are just parts of a whole package of experiences called life, and they do not require us to avoid them at all costs.
Feel the difficulty you are going through with all its strength and as open-heartedly as possible. Allow that difficulty to reach your heart, just as you would allow it for a close friend. Without doing anything, without making any judgments... Just experience.
Do not judge yourself for whatever you have done to comfort yourself in times of difficulty. Whatever the experience you have, maybe you will be able to make peace with it.
Now is the time to take action.
When you reach this point of 'accepting the experience' that we mentioned, you will no longer engage in a behavior. You can enter. Some of these behaviors are;
**Loving the feeling, experience and pain you are experiencing,
**Loving the person standing in front of you and feeling hurt,
**Loving the world, sharing your own gift with the world,
**Taking a small step to improve the situation you are in,
**Taking a small step towards realizing your life purpose,
**Just remaining silent and listening and thus being able to experience even more
It may be possible.
Of course, the behavior we will exhibit will be shaped according to the situation we are in. However, no matter what, the first step we can take is to make peace with this 'experience', not with this problem we are experiencing.
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