Attachment theory is a psychological model that examines a person's emotional and behavioral attitudes in close relationships.
When a person opens his eyes to life, he is born as a being in need of care from someone else. All the baby's needs must be met by an adult. That's why the human baby has to be attached. This is an innate structure. The baby tends to attract its mother by crying to meet its needs. However, not all crying is a physiological need. The person caring for the baby may be the mother, father, caregiver or grandmother. The important thing is that the caregiver interprets the baby's needs correctly and responds quickly. (Psychological - physiological) If this synchronized relationship continues steadily within the first 18 months, secure attachment will be formed.
The baby builds his relationship with his mother on 'secure attachment'. Individuals with this attachment style have a 'positive self - positive other' perception. Securely attached individuals can establish sincere and sincere relationships, cope with negativities in their lives, act empathetically and prudently, and help others and receive help from others when necessary. (This cooperation is not in the context of the creditor-debtor relationship.)
In summary, individuals with this attachment pattern can feel life, enjoy it, and produce strategies that can confront and cope with any problem in case of a stumble, not in the form of a cause-effect relationship of life. They see it as a process and live a fulfilling and productive life...
Another face of attachment is insecure attachment. Insecure attachment is the exact opposite of secure attachment, in which the parent cannot interpret the baby's needs correctly and cannot respond quickly. There are many factors to this. It is evaluated in a wide range from the mother's own attachment style to environmental factors to psychological problems. Insecure attachment; It is seen as avoidant, anxious and complex attachment. For avoidantly attached individuals, relationships are unreliable. They usually avoid establishing relationships, instead of confronting the problem or the person, they calm themselves down with actions such as sulking, withdrawing, eating, watching TV, or shopping. They go their own way.
Anxiously attached individuals, on the other hand, are constantly in a relationship, constantly worrying about whether the other person loves them or not, and make many sacrifices that they do not actually want to make in order to receive love.
Even before the brain development of the human baby is completed. It may seem interesting to some of us that the bond established with our mother in the first 1 - 1.5 years of life has such an impact on our lives, personalities and behaviors. However, many scientists have thought about attachment theory for years, and many supporting data have been obtained. Well, since a person cannot choose his parents, can he change the self-destructive relationship dynamic that he thinks is his personality?
No matter what attachment style a person comes from, when he makes sense of all these childhood stories and gains insight and awareness with the help of psychotherapy, the emotions of the past can stop affecting the present. Once again, it can create a secure attachment gained through its own confrontations and interpretations.
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