How many times a year do you think a preschool child is beaten? Once a month? Once a week? Are you ready to hear the answer? A preschool child is beaten 150 times a year. That is, on average, every 2.4 days. Can you believe it? You're surprised, aren't you? However, these numbers are created by our friends who are at least two digits away from us or by ourselves. Many parents try to discipline their children by beating them, based on the saying "beating is heaven". Because it's the only way they know. Since they do not have sufficient communication skills, they believe that the way to resolve conflict is through beating. Imagine that you are in a country where you do not know the language. After a very tiring day, you feel very hungry and you enter a restaurant. You have a lot of money in your pocket, but it is all in Turkish lira. When you put a few delicious-looking menus on your tray and come to the cashier, you are told how much you have to pay for them. Since you don't know that language, you take the money out of your pocket and put it in front of the cash register for him to take enough to pay. However, the cashier gives you "no, it can't be" messages with hand signals. You get angry because you are very hungry, and since you do not have another language of communication, you begin to insist on looking at the man harshly. However, since he doesn't understand your language, you start fighting after a while. And as a result, you find yourself beaten in front of the door. You realize that it is not possible to shop or have the things you want unless you convert your money into the currency of the country you are in, and you move away. The first thing you do is to find a translator with whom you can speak the same language. This is the same in our daily life. In order to solve the problem situation, we must first have the same language and the same communication skills. People who do not have sufficient communication skills resort to violence against their children and spouses. Because they don't know any other way. Children do not have one language, they have many languages ​​belonging to their developmental periods. When you encounter any problem situation, you should first come to the same eye level and establish eye contact. In this communication, it ensures that the message is delivered to the other party earlier. Accept your behavior You should objectively review whether it is acceptable or not. You should use "I" language to tell him how you feel when he behaves this way. You can apply the time-out method. When the behavior occurs, you can leave him alone in his room for 15 minutes so that he can think about that behavior. Discipline by beating is of no use. On the contrary, beating causes the child to become more angry and angry with himself. By beating, you can put an end to the child's behavior that you do not want at that moment, but this is a form of abuse that inhibits all his behavior and will also negatively affect his intelligence. The beaten child believes that the problems will be solved in this way and exhibits behaviors such as abuse, aggression and bullying in the following years. A child who is constantly beaten may, after a while, develop anxiety about performing the behavior and exhibit antisocial personality traits in social environments. The beaten child experiences an emotional attachment injury to his or her family. There are communication disorders and trust problems in their relationships with people. A beaten child cannot express himself and is more likely to solve his problems through violence rather than through talking.
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