As parents, we have some duties to instill the good behaviors we want in our children. These tasks are shaped as situations in which we will pay attention, be a model, and provide guidance with the necessary information.
A- Positive Communication
Our communication requires using I language and paying attention to physical posture and eye contact. When we establish such communication, the quality and sincerity of our relationship with our children will increase. In order not to create distance between ourselves and our children in communication:
- Criticizing, blaming - Giving orders
- Threatening - Giving advice
- Giving moral lessons - Making comparisons
- Diverting the topic - We should stay away from communication barriers such as name-calling, mocking
- Not making eye contact - Paying attention to other things
- Giving consolation.
B- Giving Responsibility
When our children start to walk We can increase their self-confidence and help them grow healthier by giving them responsibilities that they can do from the very first moment. In this way, we show that we trust them and at the same time, we make them happy and strong with the joy of success. If we find and support children who have difficulties in classes, especially in an area where they can be successful, we will observe positive changes in their lessons after a certain period of time. The point we should pay particular attention to when giving responsibilities is to assign responsibilities according to their levels. Otherwise, instead of supporting self-confidence, we will cause feelings of inadequacy to take hold.
C- Being a Model
Our children think that their parents are perfect and very strong until a certain age. However, as abstract intelligence begins to develop, they become aware of our wrong behavior and their love and respect for us begins to decrease. For this reason, if we do not want to erase the beautiful image we have created in their minds, we must pay more attention to our behavior.
D- Complimenting
A child whose positive aspects are appreciated makes more effort to improve this aspect. A child whose good qualities are not seen or appreciated tries to attract people's attention by doing negative things. At the same time, he/she reaches out to groups that notice him/her and accept his/her negative behavior. He starts to move away from us by getting involved. Some families do not want to see and say nice things in order not to spoil their children or because they mostly focus on the shortcomings. However, if we do not want our children to focus on the negative and move away from us, we must be careful to appreciate them.
E- Showing That You Love
In order for human beings to live a healthy life, the need to love and be loved must be fully satisfied. Especially children want to hear and feel this from their families. Although the most valuable people in our lives are our family, we cannot show how much we love them due to living conditions, busyness or by using this as an excuse. However, when children feel loved, they feel safe. For this reason, we must show our children how valuable they are to us by paying attention to their love language (whether they expect tactile action, service, whether they want to hear whether they are loved with words or gifts).
F- Quality Time
By devoting certain times of the day to our children, we have the opportunity to share their feelings and experiences. We can expand the areas we spend time together by doing sports, playing games, going shopping, reading books, and sometimes even doing household chores together. In this way, our children know that no matter what they experience, positive or negative, their families will listen to them and be there for them, and the first people they will ask for help will be their families.
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