With the arrival of September after a long summer vacation, the issue of opening schools often comes to the fore. The opening of schools for children who will return to school after the end of the holiday means entering a different period blended with rules, lessons and responsibilities after a comfortable and flexible holiday period. In addition, it means school for children who will just start school or who will change school; means transitioning to and adapting to a completely new process. Different emotional states may arise about the process. Although it changes according to age level, it requires many skills and responsibilities; This period includes a process that needs to be handled sensitively. In this process, various emotional and behavioral difficulties can be observed in children. The most common difficulties experienced by children in the process of adaptation to school are as follows:
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Not wanting to go to school,
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Mother, father or caregiver Not wanting to leave the givers,
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Don't bargain not to go to school,
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I don't want to talk about school,
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Desire to talk only about the negative aspects of the school by ignoring the positive aspects of the school,
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Slowing in the child's movements due to reluctance to go to school (dressing very slowly in the mornings while preparing for school and entering the school notebook slow writing, etc.),
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With the intensification of anxious thoughts in the process of adaptation to school, the child's restlessness is reflected as excessive activity (inability to sit still, increased hand-arm movements, inability to sit calmly, avoiding responsibilities) etc.),
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Physical complaints (Headache, nausea, stomachache),
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Sleeping problems (Too much or sleep less, problems falling asleep),
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Eating problems (Eating too much or loss of appetite),
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Crying often,
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Anger problems,
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Anxiety,
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Feelings of anxiety and fear.
What are the Causes of Problems Experienced in the Process of Adjusting to School?
In the process of adaptation to school, while some children adapt to school more easily, this process can be quite difficult for some children. Parents, who have difficulties with their children in this process, may have difficulties about what to do about it. Because every child can show different reactions during the adaptation process to school. In order to answer these question marks in the minds of parents and to determine the solution methods for these problems, first of all, it is necessary to examine the causes of the problems that children experience in the process of adaptation to school. These most frequently encountered reasons have been compiled under 12 sub-headings in general and presented to you. These are:
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Separation Anxiety
Separation anxiety can be observed in all children starting from infancy. is the case. Separation anxiety may occur as a result of children's attachment to one or more of their parents or caregivers (grandmother, grandmother, grandfather, aunt, etc.) more intensely than necessary. This is the state of intense anxiety and worry about being without them in environments where they need to leave these people by maintaining the relationship in the dimension of addiction. They may have more emotional difficulties in the process of adapting to school. For this reason, some children make a great effort not to be separated from their dependents and may even ignore the fulfillment of their social needs if necessary. For example, a child who has separation anxiety from his mother may not prefer to play with his peers because his mother cannot be with him at school, although he enjoys playing games, may not want to go through the school door to prevent his mother from leaving, may cry, may prefer to sit quietly and not talk to anyone while all the children are playing.
This situation indicates that the bond established between the child and the parent is unhealthy. is one of them. Because, while children maintain the trust relationship with their parents in the 0-3 age range on the basis of attachment, they need to separate from their parents in order to continue their social development after the age of 3. If separation and reunification processes can be based on mutual trust, then the process of being separated from their parents will be more acceptable for the child. The child, who can feel the balance in these separation and unification processes, will go to work, go out for a special job or go to school, etc. He knows that by normalizing the separation from his parents due to circumstances, he will meet them again after a certain period of time. Thus, the bond of trust in the process of separation and reunification with their parents is established in a healthy way. As a result, children can establish a bond of trust with people their parents trust in a shorter time. Because these children trust that their parents will choose the right people for them. Separation anxiety of children growing up in a more sheltered and narrow environment may not be noticed by their parents until they start school. Children who grow up in familiar environments brought by a small environment have to leave their small and familiar environment when they start school. As a result, separation anxiety of children growing up in a small environment may begin to be seen in the process of adaptation to school. It can also occur due to the effects of the child's temperament characteristics.
It is strongly recommended to seek support when separation anxiety symptoms are noticed in children. Otherwise, this situation will affect children's emotional processes, self-confidence development, focus processes, academic success levels and social development.
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Parenting Attitudes
Children's spending time apart from their parents during the adaptation process to school, They need to have many skills such as expressing themselves in a new social environment, taking initiatives to solve their problems on their own, fulfilling their responsibilities in lessons, and obeying school rules. These skills of children supported by attitudes show a certain level of development before they start school. However, some parental attitudes may not adequately support or hinder these skills in children. Considering the studies on this subject, parental attitudes that do not support children's social, emotional and behavioral skills in the school adaptation process; overprotective, overly oppressive, overtolerant, indecisive and indifferent parental attitudes.
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Overprotective Parental Attitude
People who show overprotective parental attitudes try to take all precautions so that their children do not have any problems by meeting all kinds of needs of their children themselves. While this situation protects children against the problems that they may experience, it can also cause children to weaken their emotional resilience in the face of problems, to be insufficient in developing their personal skills for problem solving, and to experience a lack of self-confidence.
As a result of all this, Children can become dependent on their parents. When these children start school, they may experience emotional difficulties in expressing themselves independently from their parents, coping with problems without parental protection, and feeling safe. All these may cause children to have problems in the adaptation process to school and to show signs of anxiety. >Persons with overly oppressive parental attitudes set high standards for their children and apply emotional, intellectual and behavioral pressure on their children to comply with these standards. this parent directions;
Children, who see that their parents give too much importance to school-related issues, feel under constant pressure to fail, They may have concerns such as not being able to express themselves, not being able to fulfill their responsibilities. Children who cannot handle this emotional pressure may experience difficulties in adapting to school by showing signs of anxiety. In overly permissive parental attitudes, families are more tolerant of their children's behavior than they should be. In fact, these parents try not to hurt their children emotionally by being tolerant of their children's misbehavior. However, they unconsciously give their children the message that they approve of their misbehavior. In this respect, children may have difficulties in distinguishing between right and wrong behavior, protecting boundaries, and respecting other people's boundaries. Confused about issues, they may expect to see the same unconditional tolerance at home in school. When the child does not see the same tolerance, the child may personalize this situation and feel anger towards the school or the teacher, may feel like an unloved and unaccepted child, may not be able to establish healthy bonds with his friends or teachers, thinking that others are doing him wrong at school, or may become withdrawn. Due to such possible emotional difficulties, the child may have negative feelings towards school as he has difficulty in adapting to school.
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Islamic Parental Attitudes
Those who show ambivalent parental attitudes react differently to their children's behavior rather than being consistent in every situation. For example, when the child does not eat, the parent sometimes gets angry with his child by saying, "That plate will run out!"
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