Today is the first day of school, are the students or the parents worried? A school rush that started days ago continues. How will I let go, what will happen, will he cry, will he get used to it, etc. It is always thought that the student is anxious on the first day of school, but is it really so? Are the students the only ones worried?
If we look at the parents' anxiety, we can see how right our children are in this regard. After a long summer vacation, there is an effort to get life back in order. Bedtime, wake-up time, children's breakfast, going to and from school, homework, exams, separation of parents from their children for those who will start primary school, thoughts gnawing at their brains about what they will do without me... Isn't that a lot? This being the case, anxiety actually starts with the parent and continues with the child. In fact, the child continues to internalize and experience the feelings of the parents without knowing what is happening. These appear in the child with symptoms such as not wanting to go to school, abdominal pain, crying, and fever.
When we look at the developmental stage of the child, there are two periods that reach the age of starting school. It is the final stage of the initiative versus guilt phase and the first phase of the success versus inferiority phase. In the initiative versus guilt phase (ages 3-6), the child asks questions with curiosity. These questions asked by the child must be answered simply and plainly. If the child is prevented from asking questions, he will not be curious about anything in the future. The child's academic success in the future depends on this. In addition, this is the period in which the child develops a sense of responsibility, compassion and pity.
Feeling of inferiority towards success (7-11 years): This is the period when the child tastes success. This success is not just about school success. It can happen in any field. (e.g. art, sports…) The task given to the child should be appropriate to the child's abilities and should be divided into parts if necessary. Parents should give positive feedback to the child. A space should be created where the child can feel his own existence. The child should not be compared to others. Academic self-confidence develops during this period. Planning and team spirit develop during this period. During this period, the child wants to be appreciated and approved. If this need is not met, feelings of inferiority and inadequacy occur. occurs.
The anxiety that the child experiences during this period is to leave the world he has lived in until then and move to a different world and do something alone as an individual. If the parents constantly ask questions about the school in the last stage of the entrepreneurship versus guilt phase, after overcoming their own anxiety, the answers given to the child in a correct, clear and understandable manner will reduce the child's anxiety level. On the other hand, the child who goes to school and whose achievements are appreciated and approved, as a necessity of the inferiority phase against success, will not only get rid of anxiety, but will also start their academic success with a solid step.
Children learn worry and anxiety from their parents during this period. The more parents overcome their anxiety, the more relaxed their children will be. The anxiety that arises despite all this is a natural anxiety that will be experienced during the child's developmental stage. As long as the parent continues to maintain calm and determination, these will decrease in a short time.
Good luck to all students in the new academic year…..
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