The countdown for Teog has begun... According to a research, the anxiety level of students suddenly increases 5 days before the exam and decreases with the same intensity immediately after the exam is over. In addition, higher anxiety was observed in female students than in male students.
So how should parents help their children who are experiencing anxiety?
If parents expect high success from a young age and avoid their children's mistakes. Unfortunately, if they were to criticize their children, use physical violence, describe them with negative adjectives that express judgment and humiliation (naughty, lazy, irresponsible, cowardly, incompetent, slow, etc.) in order to correct them, they unfortunately weakened their children's self-confidence. The resulting anxiety negatively affects success and is very difficult to deal with. Children from authoritarian and oppressive families have higher test anxiety rates. When parents expect perfect students, their children's exam anxiety also increases.
Again, after the child's early childhood, during the development of problem-solving skills, parents do not provide sufficient emotional support to the child and the child cannot do work on his own and is dependent on outside help. (such as immediately intervening and protecting the child when he fights with his friends, constantly saying "you can't do it, let me do it etc., not being able to give the child even simple responsibilities, constantly supporting him in doing his homework, etc.)" causes anxiety and failures in the child. This level of anxiety grows as the child grows. . However, it is seen that children who have learned to solve problems on their own and are responsible are less anxious or able to control their anxiety and are more successful.
Again, the fact that parents are able to give the feeling of unconditional love and trust starting from the womb increases the level of anxiety in the child.
Then how can parents give a sense of trust? Self-confident parents can make their children feel confident. What does this mean? There are parents who try to get their child to achieve what they cannot do, to get their child into the school they cannot attend. In other words, parents who are not satisfied with where they are and who do not have awareness about themselves Basically, they are individuals with low self-confidence. They act with reference to this while raising their children. However, the sense of trust will be strengthened in the children of parents who have a self-confident and consistent attitude. The anxiety level of a child who is treated consistently and trusted does not increase easily and remains as low as it should be. Because he knows that he will always be loved, whether he is successful or not. Of course, the child who takes the exam in this mood will focus more easily and be more successful. Many parents may think at this point that this is not easy at all. However, parents must first understand that the exam is not a goal, that there will be other exams in life and that these are just tools. In this way, many children will be saved from being forced to work beyond their capacity and being directed to a direction or profession that they do not want.
Some advice to my young friends who are wondering what to do these days, time is running out:
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First of all, you should know that taking the exam at your own school is a positive factor for you. Thus, taking the exam in a class you see for the first time and have never been to before would increase your anxiety.
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Do not engage with social media the night before and stay away from Whatsapp groups. This way, anxiety, which we always point out is contagious, will not infect you. Have a good sleep instead.
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Do not study until the last day, your anxiety will increase as you see the exam topics.
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Before the exam starts. If you feel nervous, close your eyes for a minute and think of a moment when you were happy, try to feel it and imagine that you are refreshed.
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Remember, this is just an exam and there will be worrying situations like this exam in your life. You will also experience situations that will make you very happy.
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Before and during the exam, pay attention only to yourself, looking at who does what will negatively affect your motivation.
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Sit as you are comfortable and change your posture from time to time so that you can relax if your body is tense.
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There may be questions that you do not know or cannot remember, it is not easy to know them all.
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Start by reading the questions carefully, according to their difficulty level, from easy to difficult.
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Do not fight with questions you do not know or cannot answer. Put a (question) mark and leave it for the end and come back again if you have time.
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When your anxiety level increases during the exam and you cannot pay attention, try to relax again, close your eyes and relax for a minute.
Be confident in yourself. The exam will be over and in the evening you will forget about the stress and anxiety you are currently experiencing that seems to never end.
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