It is the transition period from infancy to childhood. The child, who has started to walk and talk now, wants to get rid of being passive and dependent. When he starts to explore and touch everything, he encounters restrictions. However, he opposes frustration, becomes disobedient, stubborn and angry. He throws himself on the ground, kicks, bangs his head against the walls, and even makes himself throw up. Thus, a conflict begins between mother and child. The child also realizes how much he cannot do while trying to be independent. He still needs his mother's help. For this reason, it vacillates between submission and rebellion.
What Situations Are Encountered in the Age of 2-3 Years?
This oscillation between opposing emotions is most evident in toilet training and nutrition. . The child, who can hold the toilet whenever he wants and leave it whenever he wants, takes pleasure from it. He treats his stool as a part of himself and as a valuable object. He doesn't feel uncomfortable with his dirty diaper, he even likes the warmth and smell. In this period, if she is faced with pressure and coercion by a clean and meticulous mother and her independence is hindered, she will either resist the mother at any place and time, or submit to please her. Children who resist the mother develop stubborn and submissive personalities in the future. Sometimes, children refuse to grow up and continue to do their diapers. This is common in children who have siblings. Children who do not want to leave their diapers should be understanding, and it should be known that they evaluate their own excrement as valuable, not as "dirty" like us. The most important point in toilet training is the willingness of the child. Even though he is biologically ready, the child who does not want to use the toilet yet should not be forced. In our society, there is a tradition of insisting on food. The way to welcome our guests well is through offerings. We apply this to our children as well. Feeding him well is a way of expressing that we love him, that we take good care of him, maybe we feel better that way too, because we have done our duty. But forcing a child who is trying to be independent is to give him the opportunity to resist. Children tend to be challenged, just like toilet training. which he may refuse to eat. They do this by holding the food in their mouth or spitting it out. Meticulous mothers do not want to let the child eat it himself, for fear that it will spill out while the child is eating. Perfectionist or impatient mothers also feed in the mouth so that the child can eat quickly and in maximum quantities. However, the best thing to do is to let the child meet the food, touch it to his mouth, or simply put the spoon in his hand and taste the success of self-fulfillment after placing the food on his plate (while the child is still hungry). After the child gets his enthusiasm, the mother can continue to feed.
One of the biggest problems of this age is the “bed problem”. They don't want to sleep at night, because why would they go into a dark room and miss the fun when everyone is still having fun? That's why it's helpful to make bedtime fun. Play with water while giving him a bath, read fairy tales, have a little snack together, etc. Thus, you give him what he needs the most. He is trying to decide whether he is a baby or an older child.
What to Do When Children Get Angry?
- Don't be stubborn, don't see it as a battle to be won or lost .
- Distract her attention.
- Do not argue with her, wait patiently for her anger to subside. In the meantime, do not focus your attention on him.
- Take care of him again when his negative behavior is over. Explain why you didn't do what you wanted.
- "What will happen in the future if this happens now!" Do not punish a 2-year-old child with such fear. Do not forget that at this age, emotions are very changeable. They cry at once and shut up at once. It is very easy to divert their attention.
- This period is the “Inquiry Age”. “What is this?” “Why?” frequently asks questions. You should try to answer their questions without getting tired. When you are very tired, you can sincerely express: “I am tired now. I'll continue to answer your questions later. Now I need to rest a bit”
- Hand selection begins to become clear while holding the pen. It is completed up to the age of 4.
- Remember that not everyone has to use their right hand. Do not be pressured to be right-handed because this It is physiological, not psychological.
- The 3-year-old loves to clean and collect after messing up. This period is very suitable for teaching the sense of responsibility.
- Changes in happiness, anger, sadness, fear reflect developing cognitive capacity. He now understands situations that he could not notice or perceive before as danger. Children between the ages of 2-4 are afraid of the dark, dogs, snakes, loud noises of which they do not know the source.
What are the Fears of Children in This Period?
Calming your child when he is afraid for “What is there to be afraid of!” don't say. It would be to underestimate his feeling, to ignore it. Instead, you can say, “Don't worry, I'm with you, I'll protect you.”
Keeping away from fears does not protect your child. On the contrary, it is necessary to inform. But you should be careful: Telling too much can also intensify fear.
“Don't run, you'll fall!” The constant warnings like this can make some children unduly afraid and discouraged and insecure.
2 year olds do not cooperate in the game. They play side by side but independently of each other. Bring your child together with other children, but do not pressure them to play together or share their toys. Give the choice: “Which toy would you let your friend play with?”
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