The baby needs the mother for some basic needs from the moment he is born. These; These are basic needs such as feeding oneself, cleaning one's diaper, and putting one to sleep. Therefore, the baby becomes dependent on the mother because he cannot meet his own needs. As the child gets older, his sensitivity to the external environment develops. He wants to meet his own needs and tries to do so; such as eating with a spoon in your hand, trying to walk, getting dressed, etc. When you start learning and applying these, your addiction decreases. Undoubtedly, every child is very valuable to his family. We want to do our best for his development and comfort, but while doing this, we may make some mistakes without realizing it. These; Behaviors such as sleeping together so that the child is not afraid while sleeping at night, frequently intervening, trying to do things for him/her, and being obstructive so that he/she does not pollute or destroy the environment, prevent the child from acting independently and lead to dependency in the relationship between the family and the child. As we get older, survival becomes challenging for both the family and the child. These problems;
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When they reach school age, they do not want to go to school, they have difficulty in adapting with their friends
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They can never make their own decisions, they do not want others to influence them. They expect them to decide instead
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They are hesitant to express an opinion on a subject; They think that others know better than them
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They do not want to take responsibility
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They always ask for help from others; such as mother, father, friend, spouse, sibling
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They get support from the family when choosing a partner
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They also become dependent in their romantic relationships, and separation It is an unbearable situation for them. That's why their partner's wishes are more important to them than their own wishes.
Reasons Leading to Dependent Personality;
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Sleeping with the child for a long time.
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The family meets the child's own needs while he/she can meet them
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Trying to constantly protect the child. ; Constantly intervening in every behavior
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Constantly trying to correct the child's speech and ideas
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Preventing the child from acting independently
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Not giving the child responsibility at home
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The family assuming the responsibility of the child outside or at school
What to Do to Prevent Dependent Personality
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Set your child free
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Support him; Instead of being afraid that he will fall when he takes his first step, encourage and support him. Give him the opportunity to pick up the spoon and eat on his own, sit on a chair, and button up his own clothes when he wants to wear them. At first, he may make these things wrong, pollute the environment, fall and cry, but later he will start to learn these things.
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Talk to him, chat, listen to his ideas; In this way, he will feel that his ideas are important and valuable.
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Support him to go out and act independently.
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Give him responsibilities at home; such as tidying his room, preparing his bag, brushing his teeth.
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When he encounters a problem, give him the opportunity to find a solution instead of giving him advice.
In this way, you will raise a child who is self-confident, can make his own decisions, finds solutions to problems and does not have difficulty in living his life.
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