“Mom, I don't love you!”, “Dad, I don't love you!” We have heard these sentences from our children from time to time, right? Frankly, I have heard these sentences, and I have also seen parents who, after hearing these sentences, asked why their child does not love me, got hurt or angry, and even started to think that there was a problem with the child. If your child says these sentences, has said them, or will say them in the future, this article is for you. Parents whose children use these sentences, please rest easy. There is no problem with the child! In addition, please say, “Oh, do you ever say such a thing to a mother/father? It's such a shame, I shouldn't hear it again.” If you don't like it, don't like it. I do not love you too." Do not use sentences that prevent your child from expressing his feelings, such as: Because they need to distinguish their emotions the most and express them. They may just mix up some of their emotions and it takes some time to learn how to express them. Could what they express as "I don't love you" actually be anger, rage or resentment? Could it be that something they wanted didn't happen or they were treated in a way they didn't want? If we pay attention to these, we can help our children better understand and define the emotions they actually feel and provide accurate guidance on what they can do about it. Children's emotions are much shorter-lived than adults. Especially younger children. They may push each other and hit each other from time to time in the nursery, but two minutes later we see them playing with each other. Or he may tell you about a negative event he had with a friend and say that he doesn't love him anymore. But he may want to go to her birthday party again the next day. Therefore, what he expresses as "I don't like" may actually be that he is angry and hurt. The same situation may occur with parents. If we can realize this, at that point, instead of blocking what he is feeling, we can say, "I understand you." Could this situation you experienced have caused you to become angry, hurt or sad? Maybe that's why you think he doesn't like you? So, what do you think can be done about this situation where you are angry or hurt? Does it make you angry or hurt to be treated this way? What would you consider doing about this? We can better improve our child's own feelings, such as Acting in a way that helps him understand and improve his ways of expression will enable us to guide him more accurately. You can also give age-appropriate examples of how you behaved in situations where you were angry and resentful. Of course, apart from these examples, the observations they make in real life are also very important. Because they actually learn emotional expressions by taking a model from their parents. Therefore, it is even more important how we behave in situations when we are really angry, resentful, or when we are happy and happy. Let's not forget that emotions that seem negative are actually an opportunity and a guide for our children to express their unwanted situations and discomfort. Therefore, understanding emotions and developing the ability to express them is one of the skills that we can impart to our children and that will benefit them throughout their lives.
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