We are in the week when the first semester of the academic year ends. At the end of the semester, everyone is already surrounded by the excitement of the report card. In fact, long beforehand, people from the student's circle ask how the report card is, is there anyone weak, will you be able to get a document? Joking questions like this are frequently asked. Everyone is in a state of expectation. Some have sweet excitement, some have rush and anxiety.
So what do the grades on the report card tell us?
The report card shows the opinions of a student, which is formed as a result of testing the performance of a student in different courses and skill areas during that semester by teachers and trainers with a number of assignments and exams. Grades on the report card are not indicators of school success or failure. In education systems where the learning process is evaluated solely by report card grades, parents inevitably make the mistake of perceiving grades as success or failure.
How do children feel when they receive a report card?
Children with good report card grades and certificates of achievement are happy. However, for children who have problems with academic success, report card periods bring anxiety and fear. Bad grades on the report card can make the child feel unsuccessful, worthless, and inadequate.
How do parents feel?
All parents want their children to be successful, even more successful than themselves. In particular, parents who prepare their children for school throughout the semester, accompany them, and help them with their homework may feel that the report card is a reward for their efforts, that those grades were given to them, and in this case, the report card may also become the parent's report card. In such a case; Low grades on the report card can cause feelings of disappointment, sadness, failure, anger, guilt and shame in parents and even other members of the family.
What message should bad report card grades tell us?
There may be many different reasons for low grades on the report card. The main purpose here should be to investigate the reasons for this low grade and ultimately make an effort to solve the existing problem.
It originates from the student himself;
mental capacity, learning difficulties, attention problems There may be problems, adaptation problems, psychological-emotional problems.
Due to parents;
There may be conflicting relationships, perfectionist personality, excessive expectations, critical approaches, overprotective attitudes that prevent him from taking responsibility.
Related to school and teacher;
There may be an educator who exhibits a rigid attitude and lacks perfectionist empathy, frequent teacher changes, teacher-student relationship problems, peer bullying, physical conditions of the school, etc. Therefore, it is important to carry out a detailed examination and find the root source of the problem. Poor grades are therefore a warning to parents about revealing the existing problem and finding a solution.
What should be the reward and punishment of the report card?
An academic year has come to an end and report cards have been received with great excitement. It is natural to expect a report card gift for a child who is successful and has a good report card. Success must be appreciated and approved without going overboard. Even gifts of low financial value can be bought and are motivating. As for children with low report card grades; The punishments given to them will not be of much benefit for the next semester.
The punishments given may cause them to be alienated from school and lessons. It will be better for the child to engage in some enjoyable activities and activities that can both relax and be useful during the break. It will be enough for him to revise the subjects he had difficulty with during the break. There is no need to wait until the end of the year, or the decade, to reward success. An appropriate program and supervision should be made for a child whose exam score is low, and it is more motivating to immediately reward him when his grade increases in the next exam. This will be more effective than waiting for the end of the road.
What path should be followed?
⦁ First of all, it is necessary to find out how the child feels when he receives his report card. Try to understand their feelings.
⦁ He is aware of this situation, just like you. Contact Keep IM channels open at all times. Make him feel that you are trying to understand him with your body language.
⦁ Make an evaluation about the area where the low grades on the report card come from. (child, family, school, external factors etc.)
⦁ The grades on the report card are a parameter that reflects how the educators perceive the child's performance in that course during that period. It does not reflect the child's overall performance or performance in other areas. It does not mean that someone with low grades will be unsuccessful and inadequate in life, or that someone with high grades will be very successful in life.
⦁ Expectations should be appropriate to the child's ability and achievable.
⦁ Don't reduce your communication with your child because of poor grades on the report card. Don't get angry at him, don't shout, don't blame him, don't judge him, don't give him advice. Such a communication style will cause a decrease in self-confidence and a decrease in self-esteem.
⦁ Don't let report card grades ruin your relationship with your child when you can't handle it. Your child needs your trust, love and attention under all circumstances. In fact, if you make the child feel that you are with him and help him solve the existing problem, he will feel better and it will be easier to solve the existing problem. A contrary attitude may alienate the child from school and you. Remember that it is much easier to fix a poor grade than to fix a broken parent-child relationship.
⦁ Do not compare him/her with his/her peers, peers and siblings. Such behavior will do nothing more than make him/her feel bad.
⦁ Focus on good grades or behaviors instead of low grades on the report card. Be aware that a report card is not the only indicator of success and make your child feel this too. Try to discover his abilities. Together, guide them in line with their abilities.
If you feel inadequate and helpless in these matters; Get support from your school counselor, psychologist or child psychiatrist.
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