Turkey and World statistics reveal that the age group in which suicidal thoughts and attempts are most common is between the ages of 15-29, and is predominantly seen in young people of high school age. Therefore, interventions on suicide should be prioritized by young people. So how do young people come to the decision to end their lives?
According to Caplan (1961)'s crisis theory, people look for possible ways other than ordinary coping mechanisms in cases where they are unable to solve the crisis they face. When no other way can be found or the ways found do not seem to work as well, they choose suicide as a way of escape, as a cry for help, under the pressure of the crisis. What they mostly want is not to end their lives, but to end this pressure and to make a call for help.
So, what could be the things we call crises? According to experts, there is no specific form of crisis; in fact, anything that a person is unable to cope with can be a crisis for him. For an outside observer, the following may be situations that may create a crisis:
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A threat to bodily integrity such as sexual harassment or rape,
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As a result of an accident Loss of a physical ability (such as a basketball player losing his legs),
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Threat of losing his place in society as a result of indictment, bankruptcy or firing,
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>Loss of a sense of security as a result of migration or relocation,
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Loss of a relative due to reasons such as conflict, separation, divorce or death.
Crises can often be resolved with the person's normal coping mechanisms in the first stages or with alternative mechanisms in the second stage. However, at the stage when they are trying to cope with the crisis and their resources are inadequate, people begin to think about suicide and may give certain signals regarding these thoughts. For example, when a person talks about suicide, especially if he talks about the details or tries to acquire the means of suicide to commit it, this situation must be taken seriously. However, there is also the possibility that he does not talk about these thoughts at all. Someone close to you has been depressed lately, feeling hopeless and helpless, He makes statements such as "I wish I had never been born", he withdraws from things he is interested in and close relationships - especially suddenly - there are changes in his sleeping and eating patterns, he starts using substances such as alcohol or drugs frequently, and if this person is a man, he behaves abnormally aggressively and aggressively. If you see it showing, it means there is a risk for that person. This risk is especially higher in young people who have attempted suicide before or someone in their close circle has committed suicide. The signals displayed may differ from person to person, one person may show them all while another person may show only a few. But what is certain for all young people is that if you are in doubt, you must take action, because this could be an emergency.
Mental health professionals divide suicidal thoughts into two: active and passive thoughts. Although suicidal thoughts occur from time to time in young people with passive thoughts, there is no clear plan. Young people with active thoughts have a plan to take action and they require urgent intervention. Based on the above, if you suspect that someone close to you is having suicidal thoughts, especially active ones, you should definitely ask that person about it. Contrary to popular belief, asking will not put these thoughts into his mind; On the contrary, the person may be distracted from his loneliness by feeling that his troubles are seen by an outsider. In interviews with young people who attempted suicide, young people say that they chose this path because they could not fight alone and were alone.
What you can do as a parent or a relative is also important, of course, but it is important to get help from a professional in your approach to someone who has suicidal thoughts. . In addition to the sensitivity of the subject, it will bring anxiety, sleep problems and irritation, especially in young people, with their feeling of helplessness; This will increase their tendency to engage in risky behavior. Medication-assisted therapy will help the person think more calmly and find new ways to cope with the help of the therapist, and suicide will no longer be the only solution.
On the other hand, the presence of suicidal thoughts. In this case, families and the social environment play an important role. Because one of the most important factors in coping with the crisis is social support, and as it was said at the beginning, the person is forced to think about suicide as the only solution because he cannot fight alone. It is important that you, as a relative, make him/her feel that you are with him/her and that you will always be with him/her on this journey and that he/she is not alone.
Understanding and It is important that you listen to his problems in a non-judgemental language (with understanding questions such as how did you decide to end your life, instead of how do you do it) and not belittle him,
Let him talk about what he is experiencing, what he is feeling and thinking. and it is important to show him that you are curious about these things with sincere interest,
The person may not be ready to open up right away, it is important to be patient to wait as long as necessary,
It is important to meet with the therapist and show that you will support him throughout the treatment process.
You should keep him away from suicide tools such as rope, medicine or cutting tools until he gets rid of suicidal thoughts and moves to a healthy phase, if necessary. It is important that you stay with him/her with his/her consent (in case you stay in separate houses).
According to the common belief, if a person decides to commit suicide, he will do it. Wrong. Crisis studies show that young people's suicidal thoughts are largely a cry for help. In this sense, it is very important for you to be with him and support him. As long as your relative is alive, it is not too late; there is definitely something you can do.
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