One of the traps when evaluating children's behavior is the belief that the emerging behavior will pass and no intervention is required.
Children want to tell us something with their every behavior.
Babies use crying from the moment they are born to express their hunger and dissatisfaction and to relax.
When they grow up, they understand what is said but cannot use words. A phase comes when they try to communicate with signs that they cannot fully use. (Crying will accompany at every stage.)
Then they start to create expressions.
When the child starts to use verbal expressions, it seems as if he can explain everything.
However, the child's words are as good as words. He establishes verbal connections with the world.
The most basic thing he knows is to express his problems with his behavior and games.
It is very important to observe the child.
Observe without glossing over any behavior but without disrupting its natural flow. It needs to be done.
What has changed?
He is very active, very calm.
He plays more.
He plays less.
He is very active, he is very calm.
He plays less.
He plays less. p>
He always spends time in his room.
His sleep, his eating, his attention...
By observing children, you can prevent many problem behaviors even before they occur.
“Children's attention.” wants” then you can show interest. You can spend more time, create special times.
“It's very combative.” From where? What has changed recently? How is my emotional state as a parent?
“He is always in his room.” First of all, is he safe in his room? What is he doing in his room? Could he be exposed to inappropriate images on social media or uncontrolled internet use? Does adolescence need to be alone or is it a situation in which it is withdrawn?
Observed behaviors change shape depending on the child's temperament and context as he grows up. Emotions, thoughts and behaviors that are not talked about are stored somewhere.
The child who is ignored learns to ignore.
He grows up missing a part of himself before his emotional needs are fully met.
And. When he grows up, he carries with him throughout his life the methods he learned to use to soothe his wounds, and in similar situations, he soothes himself the way he knows best.
The message we give to our child. These problems may cause their basic belief systems about the world and themselves to be negative, and their problem-solving skills to not be sufficiently developed.
It does not go away when they grow up. It may take a very long time to realize where this transformation, which often carries negativity into adult life, originates from.
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