In addition to the child's physical and psychological readiness for toilet habits during the period of toilet training, the parents' approach towards the child is very effective on this training process. During this period, all the child's attention is in the anal region, and this is normal in terms of the developmental process. When parents start toilet training, they focus entirely on this issue, but this is the first mistake made. Because this situation may create psychological pressure on the child. Parents should avoid being oppressive, insistent, or intervening in this regard; if they do not, this may result in the child rejecting the process or experiencing elimination disorders. The child should not be asked questions about the toilet more than 5 times a day.
The problems experienced in toilet training are partly due to the parents' perspective on this issue. Because the majority of parents see this as the most difficult process and focus on the difficulties they may experience from the beginning and attract into their lives what they have imagined in their minds. So don't overestimate this process, because the more you enlarge it, the bigger your experience will be. Toilet habit is an effort at individualization, like walking and talking. It is the parent's duty to support this process. In other words, you should look at this process not as an obstacle to be overcome, but as a part of the normal developmental process that just needs a little support from you.
Since this process is a sign that your child is out of infancy, if you want him to adapt to this process, turn your child into a baby. You have to stop seeing it like that. You should clearly state that he is ready for toilet training and that he can go to the toilet whenever he wants, just like mom and dad. However, the important point is to make sure that your child is ready before starting toilet training. The child will already give his own clues that he is ready. All you have to do is observe and make sure. The development of behaviors such as the child defecating in hiding, telling you after going to the toilet, and being uncomfortable with his diaper are indicators that we are ready.
During this period, children become curious about the toilet and the people in the toilet. Situations such as entering after the person entering the toilet and wanting to follow him may occur. ir. In such cases, never allow your child to watch you so that it does not negatively affect the development of the concept of privacy and your child's psychological development. During this process, it will be beneficial for your child to use books and toys instead of observing you. He/she will not feel lonely by identifying with the story of the character in the story coming out of the diaper. At the same time, you can tie a diaper to a doll or teddy bear and play a game to teach it toilet habits. These helpful methods will help your child adapt to this process more easily.
In order for this education to turn into a habit and for this acquisition to occur in a healthy way, it is important for the mother and father to exhibit a consistent parental attitude. A routine should be determined and your child should be taken to the toilet every 30 minutes at the latest, saying "toilet time", in proportion to the duration of his/her dryness. Our aim in this process is to raise awareness of the need to go to the toilet when it comes. This training covers the first week, then these processes should be gradually extended, such as increasing it from 30 minutes to 45 minutes, and finally, the child will gradually reach the level of telling himself when he comes to the toilet, but you should avoid repeating the question "Do you have a toilet?" because this will create resistance in your child instead of motivating him more. will cause. Therefore, care should be taken not to use this question more than 5 times a day. If you frequently ask questions and become intrusive, this will cause your child to feel under psychological pressure and cause anxiety.
If you have definitely started toilet training, you should eliminate diapers from your life. If you still diaper your child, it will cause regression in your child and he/she will not be fully toilet trained. Therefore, instead of diapering the child when going out during this period, you can choose not to go out or keep the time you go out shorter. It may require temporary sacrifices in social life until you fully achieve this gain, but then you will have gained something that will make your life easier. For this reason, when training begins, say goodbye to diapers with your child and remove them from your life completely.
The first toilet experience is very important. He/she can ask you questions and check the toilet bowl. You may find this situation frightening, your attitude is very important here. You must display an attitude that understands and calms him down. If you have a criticizing, belittling and challenging attitude, this will only increase your child's anxiety. That's why innovation and the new always scare us, even we adults can develop anxiety towards the new. All emotional states experienced by the child are very normal, understand and make him/her feel understood. The stool coming out of the child's body is also a part of him/her, he/she may not want to leave it and may wonder where it went. When answering these questions, you should use terms such as disappearance, disappearance, and merger because they may reinforce existing concerns. A short and clear explanation such as "when you go to the toilet, they go on a long journey from there" is sufficient. If the sense of belonging needs support, you can support it with a sentence such as "every part of you that goes on the journey will always know that they belong to you."
There is no failure in toilet training. Accidents may occur frequently during this process, but you should avoid overreacting and punishing when accidents occur. Give your child responsibility when accidents occur. Help him, but giving him the main responsibility will help increase his ability to cope with the situation.
You should pay attention to the emotions you reflect while changing your child's diaper. Changing diapers by reflecting emotions such as boredom, anger, and anger causes your child to inhibit his/her acquisition of toilet habits. That's why you should have a calm approach, free from negative emotions, and take the process naturally. Communicate your child's achievements and display a motivating and supportive attitude. During this period, it is very important for the parent to support them and keep their emotions and behavior under control. It should not be forgotten that the emotion with which we monitor and support our child as he develops is the primary factor in the child's development process.
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