What Is a Perfectionist Person?
A perfectionist is a person who expects himself to be perfect, constantly tries to live
to be seen as perfect, and accepts a standard other than
perfect
Perfectionism may seem functional in that it allows us to experience new things
with the motivation to be the best, challenge ourselves, and grow
as people. Mismatched
perfectionism is the dark side of this constant effort and can cause problems in many of our relationships
, especially with our family,
partners, colleagues.
Characteristics of Perfectionism
The person may show different perfectionist characteristics at work or in their relationships.
Although most of us see some of these characteristics in ourselves
it is important to remember that the perfectionist experiences all these to an extreme
. The perfectionist person exhibits these behaviors excessively, causing serious problems in their family and business
life and relationships.
1. They Think Too Much To Make A Decision
It's good to be careful when making a decision. It shows that we act responsibly,
take steps by calculating possible risks. However,
in this overthinking in perfectionism, the person becomes unable to make a choice and
to decide.
People can get away from their partners because they get into their heads and get too involved in analyzing the situation while they are thinking too much. They also constantly
ask others for their opinions or perspectives. Finally, they look for reassurance
or someone to decide for them.
2. They Suspicious of Their Decision
Intensive analysis does not end after making a perfectionist decision. These moments are often triggered by fear,
they continue to seek reassurance from others that their decision was the right one.
3. They Worry About Their Mistakes
The primary goal of perfectionism is to avoid emotional pain ir. Because of this
, when he/she makes a mistake, he/she may feel a much deeper pain
than other people. Even a common mistake
can be unbearably frustrating for a perfectionist.
Rejection is very painful, especially when it comes from people we care about
and a mistake made is that the perfectionist is not accepted,
their need for approval, love, and attachment can feel threatened
.
4. They Criticize Too Much
It's not surprising that a perfectionist criticizes himself too much.
Unfortunately, these criticisms can be too harsh and keep one's mood in a constant cycle
throughout the day. may adversely affect. They constantly evaluate
their own behavior through a method called "
self-monitoring." This is a method they use to avoid being caught
vulnerable to being judged and rejected by others.
Unfortunately, they try to avoid the pain of being judged by others
by constantly observing and criticizing their own behavior
to judge themselves.
5. They Show Procrastination and Avoidance Behavior
Procrastination is a frequent
characteristic of the perfectionist, although it is not usually thought of as such. The perfectionist, who is in constant observation and doubt, can avoid important tasks
because he is emotionally exhausted. This is especially the case when they have to perform
that can be considered as a project to be graded at school or a presentation at work
. Feeling the need to perform
and the fear of failure can place an emotional
burden on the perfectionist. They may find it easier to avoid
working on that project or presentation until absolutely necessary. This may look like self-sabotaging
6. They Respond Defensive
Because a perfectionist's self-talk is often critical
, it is common for them to respond defensively
or reactively to feedback from others.
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Remember that one of the goals of perfectionist behavior is to avoid pain, including emotional hurt
. Even healthy and constructive
feedback can be perceived as rejection by a perfectionist
and can be deeply hurtful. That's why
defensive tendencies are activated to protect themselves.
7. They May Be Prone to Hopelessness and Depression
Being a perfectionist can make a person feel like they are running out. Although
often causes it, the constant pressures felt can make a perfectionist
despair.
Some people know that they need to have healthy expectations
about themselves. They are aware of their personal limitations and understand that their goals must be reasonable, achievable and
sustainable. Perfectionists often don't know where this
line should be, and their self-expectations can be irrational
and unattainable. When they can't meet what they expect from them
they feel like they have failed. They do not see that the goal they set for themselves is
far from reality and unattainable, and they think that the problem is in their abilities or
the lack of effort they put in.
Because of their all or nothing thinking, perfectionists' self-perceptions are often They are low and live with a sense of inadequacy.
Because they expect unreasonable things from themselves, they lack a sense of self-efficacy
and may drift into despair and depression in a cycle characterized by feelings of failure and worthlessness
.
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