The first place where children receive education is 'family'. From an early age, children take the family structure and communication between family members as a 'role model'. The first role models of a child growing up in a loving, active family that listens to each other and a child growing up in an environment with family members who do not listen to each other are different from each other, and accordingly, the social relationships of these two children develop differently.
In raising children, the personality of parents is important. The impact of their structures is undeniable. At the core of parents' child-rearing attitudes lie their 'core beliefs'. As parents, in order to raise our children in a healthier way, we must first change the behaviors that we do not like in ourselves and start looking at things flexibly.
'How do our negative behaviors prevent us from raising our children?'
'What can we change as we wish?'< br /> 'How can we communicate more easily and effectively with our children?'
As parents, if you have low self-confidence, you will reflect this on your child. First of all, as parents, you should develop your self-confidence so that you can convey to your children that they are valuable and raise individuals with high self-confidence. To do this, first determine the aspects you want to change and take action!
Delete your negative experiences and bad experiences from your memory.
As individuals who will shape your child's life, get help from an expert if necessary to get rid of your own problems. Make a more positive start.
Talk to yourself.
Be aware of your internal conversations that blame and judge yourself and replace them with positive statements: 'I am successful, I am valuable'. Apply this communication structure to your children as well.
Do not postpone what you will do.
Write down the tasks you want to do or have left unfinished. Complete these tasks by maintaining your self-control. The work you leave unfinished may be due to your fear of failure. Completing these tasks will increase your self-confidence. Support your child so that he does not leave his work unfinished.
Think about what you want to achieve.
Experiencing the feeling of success will put you in a positive mood. child People also become happier when they achieve something. Appreciate the achievements of your children and yourself and share the taste of success.
Think about the things you have achieved in the past.
And tell them about them to your relatives. Tell your friends about your successes as well as your troubles. Likewise, be generous when describing your children's successes.
Do not exaggerate your problems.
As you exaggerate the situations in which you experience difficulties, you will feel like you cannot cope with this problem. This causes your self-confidence to decrease. Remember how you overcame previous problems. Whenever your child encounters a problem, remind him of the moments when he was successful and help him visualize the feelings of when he was successful.
Move, walk around.
When you think you are overwhelmed, walk and exercise. Exercising increases your serotonin and endorphin hormones. So you feel better. Plan activities where you can exercise jointly with your child.
Imagine what you want as if it had come true.
Your subconscious takes action with your commands. Dreaming with the visualization technique activates your subconscious. Let your children dream and share these dreams.
Learn to say 'No'.
Do not do things that will upset yourself in order to make someone else happy. At the same time, don't regret it and turn back after saying 'no'. Show your child that you are consistent in your decision when you say 'no'.
Identify the behavioral patterns that push you to failure.
Develop methods to eliminate these patterns. Take a step for change. If you notice these patterns in your child, direct them to develop and change them.
Get rid of your negative thoughts.
Negative thoughts become stereotypes in your brain. As you use these patterns, they are nourished and return to you as negativity. Recognize these patterns and replace them with more positive, realistic thoughts.
Focus on your goal.
A mood focused on success always gives you energy and happiness. Remember that you are the one who directs your life. This behavior Your education will enable you to be a role model for your child in terms of 'success'.
Source: Kasap, N. E., Children of the New Age: Methods to Make Your Children Successful, Hayy Kitap, 2008.
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