The Plague of the Age: Mistaking spoiledness for self-confidence
We want to give courage to our children. You can do it, it's child's play, trust yourself, you are very successful... Thus, we give the message that they can achieve whatever they want. We make them believe that they always deserve the best and that they are superior to everyone else. Then our children's expectations from life increase. A lot of money, being famous, being very successful, a lot, a lot…
Always more, always abundance, always abundance.
Because these kids always want more. One university is not enough. After studying at two universities, then getting a master's degree, doctorate degree, and language education, they are unable to achieve any of them; Because they lose what they have before they appreciate it.
These children, who are very confident in themselves, aim to get a good job, but because they are not open to criticism, they become unsuccessful and unhappy in business life. This unhappiness brings with it aggression. They can become more selfish, aggressive and depressed…
I get questions; 'How can I raise a perfect child?' And I ask.
- What does perfect mean? ?
- Do we really want a perfect child?
- So are we perfect?
- To whom will it be perfect?
What complex questions, aren't they? And so is the answer. Nobody is perfect. Our children don't have to be perfect either. It is enough for them to know that we will always love them.
Children who are put on airs by saying that you are perfect, I sent you to the best schools, you have always been successful, cannot get up when they fall and cannot cope with their pain. At the first obstacle comes the fear of failure and it takes longer for them to recover.
- So where are we doing the wrong thing?
- While we want to raise self-confident children, the other side Are we missing their feelings?
A self-confident child is very good at communicating and does not focus only on themselves. They do not forget to be respectful to others.
Selfish individuals, on the other hand, only see their strengths and do not care about the other party's feelings, instead of focusing on both their strengths and weaknesses.
Our main goal for our children is to provide them with the ability to empathize. with respect While ensuring communication success, it should be encouraged to improve their weaknesses.
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