Sexuality remains a difficult subject to talk about as it is still considered a taboo in our society. For this reason, individuals either remain hesitant about expressing any sexual problems they experience or try to solve and obtain information in unhealthy ways. However, it can also be said that there is a certain increase in the number of people trying to get support in the process, in proportion to education.
It is seen that there are serious problems in accessing accurate information, especially in rural areas, in connection with the level of education. For this reason, the most frequently asked question is 'What is the Vaginismus Problem? What is the Cause of Vaginismus? Vaginismus Symptoms? I will try to give information on topics such as Vaginismus Exercises'.
Vaginismus Definition
Vaginismus is a result of involuntary contraction of the muscles in the vaginal area during the first sexual intercourse in women. Although it is defined as the absence of penetration and the inability to achieve intercourse, it is also defined as the reaction of women who are psychologically affected and show extreme anxiety in order to protect themselves during sexual intercourse or gynecological examination. Women experiencing vaginismus experience involuntary, recurring or continuous contraction of the muscles in the outer third of their vagina when they are about to have sexual intercourse or when they know that there will be an intervention in their vagina during a similar gynecological examination, and their legs close with this contraction. The anxiety they experience becomes so intense that they may pacify their partners by exhibiting pushing behavior along with this anxiety, or gynecological examination may become difficult.
When Does the Problem Start and How Does It Develop
In fact, the problem of vaginismus is always present in almost most of the cases from the first moment of sexual life, but the fact that women who have this problem have almost never experienced sexual intercourse prevents them from realizing the existence of the problem. Avoidance of sexual intercourse before marriage is generally displayed unconsciously. Abstinence is initially motivated by moral or religious reasons, but even after marriage has taken place, sexual intercourse remains the same. The drinking experience is constantly postponed for reasons such as headache or fatigue. After the first attempt causes extreme fear, anxiety and stiffness, the couple begins to become less enthusiastic about trying again, and as a result, attempts at sexual intercourse begin to become quite infrequent within a few months. Ultimately, couples generally develop a special sexual life habit for themselves, but sexual intercourse is not included in this new sexual habit that develops.
When we look at the childhood or teenage periods of women with vaginismus problems, they are generally described by their families as "the good girls of the family". We see that they are described as “. Apart from this, it is seen that there are women who do not go beyond the boundaries drawn for them and comply with the rules, who do not reflect their anger and resentment outside, and who also need to be accepted by their family and social circles.
Vaginismus emerges as a defensive reaction. For this reason, women with vaginismus develop unconscious defenses and see men as threatening and aggressive, and therefore they refuse intercourse. In addition to all these, the perception of sexuality as something "dirty" and "bad" causes the development of resistance to sexual intercourse in the future.
Violence related to sexuality in the mind, being invaded and perceiving sexuality as dirty and bad is vaginismus. Since it brings with it the need for the woman experiencing vaginismus to defend herself and take precautions, the meaning of the contractions that occur in the woman actually becomes an effort to take precautions for all these things we have mentioned.
Do Women Experiencing Vaginismus Do Not Feel Sexual Desire?
In women experiencing vaginismus, when sexual intercourse occurs, the contraction is very strong, it is as if a wall of flesh and bones has been built. However, in most cases, it is observed that women with this problem do not have problems with sexual desire, sexual arousal or orgasm, as long as vaginal penetration is not forced. However, when it comes to sexual intercourse, this thought or even a small attempt can cause women with vaginismus to contract and experience panic.
Women with Vaginismus. Characteristics of women
It may seem interesting, but women and even their spouses who have vaginismus problems have common characteristics that are generally similar to each other.
- They are generally inexperienced in male-female relationships,
- They exhibit childish behavior
- They do not want to become an adult woman
- They may have phobic anxiety and discomfort
- They especially avoid sexual issues
- They are prone to sexual arousal and orgasm
Characteristics of Vaginismus Partners
- They are generally kind, polite and understanding people .
- They are known as "respectful" individuals by those around them.
- They are passive and generally not assertive.
- They do not have sufficient sexual experience.
- They are passive towards their spouses. They may worry or even be afraid of causing harm
Psychosocial Causes of Vaginismus
Research shows us that in vaginismus cases, the development of the problem is It shows that the psychosocial reasons are as follows and that women experiencing this problem face some or most of the following situations:
- The father or the father figure in the family is extremely authoritarian and oppressive (In such cases, the woman almost She chooses to marry or has sex with someone who is the opposite of her father.)
- It is observed that the mother figure, unlike the father, is weak and powerless.
- Problems and difficulties are observed in the parent-child relationship between the father and the daughter.
- The family's attitude and view towards sexuality is that sexuality is worthless and degrading.
- The feeling of disgust developed towards sexual organs and the inability to touch and dislike sexual organs
- Sexuality in religious matters related negative conditioning
- Exposure to or witnessing sexual violence
- Fears that the hymen will be damaged or lost
- Fear of getting pregnant or that it will be a scary experience thoughts about sexuality
- False beliefs about sexuality (sexual myths)
- Homosexual identification
- Cultural reasons
Vaginis Spouses' Attitudes Towards Each Other as a Result of the Mouth Problem
As this problem occurs, spouses experience some anxiety within themselves and develop some attitudes towards each other. For example, in couples where this problem occurs, the woman; He begins to experience some contradictions within himself. While part of him says he needs help, another part of him is extremely afraid of getting treatment. At the same time, while experiencing disappointment, this disappointment is accompanied by a feeling of inadequacy and, on the other hand, he experiences an intense fear of abandonment.
The man in the couples where this problem occurs; At first, he thinks that he is not wanted by his partner, but after a while he accepts the existence of the problem and begins to become passive.
As a result of the process, the couple gradually exhibits avoidance behaviors that put an end to all their physical activities and efforts to get closer.
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