The emotions of a child watching a murder are terror, fear, guilt, shame and helplessness. When a child is exposed to such a scene, his first feeling is terror. The behavior of the terrified child is freezing. The child freezes while watching this image and records everything that happened in the depths of his memory in an indelible way.
To what extent does the fact that the person who was murdered is the child's mother and the murderer is his father carry the trauma in the child?
The child is exposed to The fact that the image he is left with belongs to his mother and father creates a feeling of fragmentation within the child. It feels as if the child's entire soul and body have been shattered into millions of pieces as thin as a cloud of dust. He feels as if he has disappeared.
A child's family is his world. Family is the place where the child feels safe and secure against any danger from outside. In this case, the child's sense of trust in the world is seriously damaged when he witnesses that the greatest threat and danger comes from his family. For this child, the world is now unsafe and people are dangerous. He lives his remaining life with a deep suspicion that he will be harmed at any moment.
How does witnessing a murder affect a child's future? What is the psychology of the child growing up after this great trauma?
In this event that the child is exposed to, everything that exists around him is recorded in the child's brain as reminders of the traumatic memory. His mother's scream at the moment of death, the furniture in the room, the knife in his father's hand, the smell inside. Every time the child comes into contact with these reminders, he or she returns to the moment of terror, no matter how old the child is. Therefore, this child is constantly exposed to the emotion of this traumatic memory in his later years.
The child who witnessed the murder often sees the traumatic moment as a nightmare in his dreams in the first stage. Because these nightmares terrify the child, he does not want to sleep. Therefore, the most common situation we encounter in these children is sleep problems. In addition, sleeping at night, not being able to sleep alone, dullness, loss of interest in what is happening around them, not being able to play like other children, and always expecting danger are other mood disorders that we frequently encounter in these children.
Another emotion felt by the child who witnessed the murder is guilt and shame. child murder any He feels guilty and ashamed for not being able to prevent it somehow.
Growing up after such a trauma, the child either tries to take the pain out on himself or tries to make the people around him pay for it. He may find a spouse or lover who harms him, for example, the possibility of finding an aggressive partner like his father is very high. Or he puts the responsibility for his pain on all other people. He harbors endless anger, hatred and grudge against everyone.
If the child who is subjected to murder is a boy, when he becomes an adult man in the future, his tendency to show violence to his wife or girlfriend is very high. The son tortures his wife in the same way that his father tortures his mother.
What should be the approach to a child who witnessed a murder, so that he or she can overcome the trauma with minimal damage and enter the normalization process? What are the duties and responsibilities of both family and state institutions?
The child who has been exposed to such a trauma The first thing to do is to provide a safe environment where there is no visual or auditory stimulus that will remind you of this trauma. The child should not be allowed to watch television during this period.
The child can stay with an adult in the family who feels safe. It is appropriate not to remove it from its natural environment. It is not appropriate for the adults he stays with or the people around him to talk about this incident in the presence of the child or to ask the child questions about the incident. If the child asks anything about the incident, short and clear answers should be given, and when the child shares his feelings about the incident, he should be listened to carefully and without interrupting.
For the child who has experienced such a trauma, it helps him both to complete his mother's mourning and to express his anger towards his father. should be allowed.
Psychologist support is very important in this process. The support of an expert psychologist allows him to digest the trauma he has experienced. It prevents permanent damage that may occur from trauma.
Our duty as a society is not to watch videos of such events and not to let people around us watch them. These videos cause people to become desensitized and normalize the events.
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