Lying behavior is frequently seen in children between the ages of 3-4. (If you ask your child who spilled all his toys on the floor, who messed up this place, he will probably say that it was not his father, his mother, fairies, heroes who messed it up. Even though we adults describe this as a lie, this is not actually a lie. .
Children aged 3-4 have not yet developed a sense of reality, they cannot distinguish between reality and unreality, and this is the period when their imagination is at its widest. When they tell stories, they will often have imaginary friends and special powers. ️In this period, children are taught imaginary friends, Do not use expressions such as there is no such thing as special powers, these only happen in fairy tales, such expressions will prevent the development of imagination.
️Do not give training not to lie during this period, avoid expressions such as lying is shameful and sinful.
(5-7), the concept of reality, imagination, and the ability to distinguish reality from abstract concepts begin to form gradually. If you often punish children by getting angry when they behave in a way that you do not want, in order not to lose the love of their parents, children will be punished in some situations (when they think their parents will be angry). They distort reality in their mischief and this is normal behavior for that age period.
In order for lying behavior to be considered a problem, the child must be 10 years old and beyond. The child should be carefully monitored during these times. In what situations does he lie? What is the real reason behind the lie? (Does the child lie to gain the love of his parents, to appear competent, to attract attention, to be popular among his friends, to compensate for his shortcomings? What happens to the child as a result of the lie?
- Parents What Should Be Done?
- First and foremost, parents and caregivers must be honest and consistent. Remember that children will take the caregiver as a model from a young age. You should not deceive children no matter how old they are! ( For example, when I leave home to go to work, I will bring you a toy so that the child does not cry from behind. And then you do not come home with toys.) Children are very good observers and recorders.
- Receiving love attracts attention. They lie for money. Do not love your child in a cause-effect relationship. (For example; if you are a good child, I will love you very much; if you misbehave, I will not be your parent; if you are a successful child, I will be proud of you.) In cases where the child makes a mistake, he resorts to lying in order not to lose the love of his parents.
- Lie. Another reason is lack of self-confidence. Therefore, celebrate your child's successes frequently, do not compare him with other children, his older brother or sister. Remember that each child's world, capacity and abilities are different from each other. Know your child, and make sure that the goals you set are in line with his or her abilities and capacities.
- Do not put stereotypes when describing lying behavior. (Like a white lie) (if you lie for someone's sake, to avoid upset, this is not a bad behavior). Regardless of the reason and result, distorting the truth is lying. And there is no good or bad lie. Be clear.
- Appreciate and reward honest behavior.
Just as your child learns his first words from what comes out of your mouth, in later years he will learn his behavior, good and bad habits from you and those around you. Your children are your models. If you are a good example, honest and consistent, do not spare your love and compassion for your superiors in every situation, if you are a good listener and understander for them; I'm sure you won't encounter any chronic destructive problems.
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