For various reasons, children may not want to go to school from time to time. Fear of school or school refusal is when the child does not want to go to school due to intense anxiety or has difficulty staying at school all day. Physical complaints, crying and anger outbursts, etc. that occur during school days. These behaviors can be listed as symptoms of school fear. Children often complain of abdominal pain, nausea, dizziness, and headache in order not to go to school. These symptoms may disappear when the child is allowed to stay at home. Children who are afraid of school refuse to go to school because they exaggerate situations that may cause anxiety at school and underestimate their own skills in dealing with these situations.
Reasons for school fear:
1. Difficulty in separating from parents, separation anxiety. Children who spend most of their time at home with their families and have not experienced separation from their parents before may perceive the world outside as dangerous and therefore be afraid of going to school.
2. Fear of being abandoned by their parents,
3. Being raised by overprotective parents. . Since these children are used to being protected by their parents, they may feel inadequate in this regard. They may be afraid of school because they feel vulnerable when their parents are not with them.
4.Parents' concerns about separation from the child,
5.Lack of social skills, the child not knowing how to behave in social environments and feeling anxious about this,
6.Fear of failure. Especially in children with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, Specific Learning Disorder, speech disorder and mental retardation, the child may not want to go to school because he/she is deficient in a certain area and has difficulty learning compared to his/her peers.
7. Boundaries at home are unclear and ambiguous,
8. Difficulty in adapting to school rules,
9. Harsh attitude of the teacher, exposure to physical or verbal violence by the teacher at school, giving the child tasks and homework that exceed his capacity,
10. Problems in friendship relations, being bullied by his friends. being ridiculed, being exposed to peer bullying,
11. Significant changes in the child's life; school or class change �i, moving, birth of a sibling, loss of a loved one, accidents, illnesses, etc.
12. Jealousy of your sibling who stays at home, 13. Domestic conflicts, communication problems, divorce, illness of a family member or loss.
The child with school fear perceives these situations as threats and experiences anxiety that he cannot control. Since fear of school can occur for various reasons, the reason why the child does not want to go to school must first be determined and a solution must be followed accordingly.
To help the child who is afraid of school:
1. First of all, parents should make sure whether there is an organic reason for their child's physical complaints.
2. It should be investigated whether there is a situation that can really disturb the child at school. Children who are exposed to peer bullying may not want to go to school even if they have not experienced school-related anxiety before. The existence of such a situation should be questioned by talking to the child in an accepting manner and by establishing cooperation with the school.
3. The child should be allowed to experience separation from his or her parents outside of school. The child's behaviors that he can do on his own, independently of his parents, should be praised and the child should be encouraged to do these behaviors. should be helped to feel. There should be cooperation with the child's school counselor and classroom teacher.
5. It should not be forgotten that the child experiences school fear beyond his or her control. For this reason, parents should not criticize the child, put excessive pressure on the child, punish or threaten the child. The child should be explained calmly why he/she should go to school.
6. The child should be talked to about his/her fear of school without judging him/her. Parents ask the child: "Is this scary?" One should not underestimate the child's fear by saying: “I understand that you are really afraid of going to school,” etc. He should show the child with words that he understands and accepts the child's feelings. 7. If the parents are worried about the child going to school, the child will feel the same way too. For this reason, parents are specific about their own concerns. They should make comments and get support from an expert when necessary to solve them.
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