The concept of marriage is a concept that is shaped according to the norms of each society and has different definitions. However, by general definition, marriage is a contract approved by society. (Özugurlu, 1985) This contract, which includes the approval of society, is formed between two people on the axis of cultural values drawn by societies and brings with it certain limits.
According to another definition, marriage is a marriage in which a man and a woman come together for certain purposes. It is a system with various social norms, both of which have legal obligations. (Özgüven, 2014)
Marriage is also a cultural institution when considered in terms of its boundaries, rules and meanings (Çavuşoğlu, 2011). This cultural institution carries the traces of the society, geography and history in which it lives, and at certain points it contains the traces of universal values.
Marriage, as an institution that formalizes that two people dream of being happy with each other in the long term, brings with it certain obligations, and obligations come to the fore when it comes to protecting this institution. The obligation of fidelity emerges as the most important issue in protecting the institution of marriage. (Kubat, 2012)
Many situations emerge today where the fidelity obligation of marriage has disappeared. The most common of these situations is the deception behavior that occurs when one or both parties violate the obligation of loyalty.
Cheating behavior has become the subject of study by mental health experts due to the traumatizing situation it causes and the many psychological disorders that develop along with it. It has been a subject on which many studies have been carried out. Of course, it is not possible to clearly determine the reason for cheating behavior. However, many studies on cheating have been done and continue to be done, both in the light of statistical data and the psychological problems that develop after cheating.
The results of research on cheating are quite diverse. However, the factors that cause cheating have been grouped under certain headings as a result of various studies. Factors that pave the way for cheating behavior It is possible to examine the factors under 3 main headings. These are listed as individual reasons, external reasons and reasons arising from the relationship (Dorff, 2008).
Internal reasons, as the name suggests, are reasons originating from the individual, but they also bring about reflections of external reasons at many points.
References made to social norms and social roles reflect on individuals at some point, and this reflection is effective in shaping internal reasons.
External reasons, on the other hand, are a much broader concept and include the perspective on deception in society. Many sociocultural subheadings such as angle, gender-specific reactions to cheating under the influence of gender, economic reasons and the balance of power they create in marriage are gathered under this broad heading.
When external reasons are examined and a determination is made on the basis of gender, research shows the types of cheating. It is stated that women have a high tendency to cheat emotionally and men to cheat sexually (Bayar, 2015).
Based on this research conducted in the literature, it can be said that two separate roles are assigned to marriage in society based on gender.
Sexuality is centered in the role assigned to men in the institution of marriage and the main point of satisfaction in marriage is sexuality, while for women, the main point of satisfaction in marriage is emotional processes.
These two different results bring about two different genders approaching marriage from different perspectives, and many times in a marriage conflict, both parties fail to fully understand each other's expectations.
The failure of both parties to understand each other in marriage causes problems. It ignites discussions that enter into a vicious circle at the point of resolution, and as a result of these discussions, both sides are worn out.
The worn-out parties begin to seek satisfaction from points where they cannot be satisfied, and under the influence of unresolved problems, one or sometimes both of the parties apply various problem-solving methods in order to obtain satisfaction. As seen in the behavior of cheating, in order to achieve the expected satisfaction, the parties must take appropriate action in society and in the institution of marriage. Although it is not, it is an applied solution.
At this point, the importance of couple therapy is of key importance in increasing satisfaction in marriage and in understanding the expectations of both partners based on gender, cultural perception and gender roles.
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Couple therapy offers a pioneering solution in repairing many relationships before they wear out, so that men and women can see their expectations from each other and the knots through a common lens.
Couples therapy is of vital importance in clarifying the perceptions shaped under the influence of external reasons that cause the institution of marriage to wear out, in revealing the gender outline in the minds of the partners, and in presenting a concrete picture of the expectations from marriage that develops around these.
The importance of couple therapy is seen concretely in the analysis of the emergence processes of partners' cheating behaviors resulting from lack of satisfaction and in the emergence of cheating behavior aimed at eliminating satisfaction.
Couples therapy not only plays a protective role in preventing the mistakes made by the parties in their marriage in the process of seeking satisfaction, but also plays an important role in increasing the quality of the marriage by preventing possible wear and tear.
Couples therapy emerges as a support that should be taken not only when problems arise with concrete examples, but also when the factors that cause problems are present in the relationship.
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