Sexuality is a must for marriage. Sexuality, which plays a key role in long-term relationships, is also one of the biggest reasons for separation. Unfortunately, the relationships of couples who are unhappy in bed do not last long. So how should couples treat each other in bed for a happy marriage? Expert Psychologist Naciye Tokaç gave tips for happy relationships.
Every married couple wants to be happy in their marriage and have a home where they get along well and feel understood. There are responsibilities that each couple must fulfill in order to be happy in marriage. Isn't there something that couples need to do other than just being responsible and fulfilling their material and spiritual duties for their family? Here, the material elements for happiness in marriage, that is, what needs to be done in addition to making a living, fulfilling the health and other duties of family members, emerge. Because marriage is an institution that includes many different elements.
Cannot be expressed clearly
For a good married life, effective use of mutual conversation, listening and understanding skills, anger Controlling emotions, sharing domestic responsibilities, and sharing common moments are as important as sexual life between spouses. Sexuality is a process that is often not expressed openly, is not talked about much even between spouses, but has a huge impact on how the relationship continues.
In order to fully understand the impact of sexuality on married life, we must first touch upon what is paid attention to between couples, what is given more importance, and to what extent these affect sexual life.
Couples have the most intimacy and closeness with each other. pays attention. To whom do you confide the joys and pains deep within your soul the most? With whom do you share the moments that are very special to you? You do all these with people you feel sincere and close to. The best answer to the question of whether such closeness and sincerity is necessary for sexuality is "yes, it is necessary for a satisfying sexuality."
It is necessary to establish closeness and be sincere because men and women need to be ready to experience sexuality, and this readiness occurs in different preparation periods for men and women. most passes. It is necessary for couples to have close and intimate relationships in order to talk and respond to each other's different readiness and adapt.
For women, it is more important to be understood
For women, While being understood and verbal and physical commitment are important; For men, it is more important to make the other person happy.
In such a situation, men and women prepare for sexuality differently. While a woman needs love to desire sexuality and prepare herself for sexuality, a man needs sexuality to feel love. In other words, men realize their love through sexual stimulation.
Men's and women's understanding of sexuality is different
While women need love for sexual intercourse, men need sexuality to express their love. it needs. When a woman's emotional needs are met, she becomes interested in sexuality. Men also want to experience love and affection deeply, but for this they need to feel sexual stimulation.
If different wishes are not acted upon...
At this point, conflict sometimes arises between men and women. Because a woman needs to be in communication with her husband to show that she loves him and to feel loved. Men also want to love and be loved, but they need sexuality to feel this. When men and women want to have sexual intercourse, it may not be possible to be stimulated and achieve satisfaction together if these differences are not treated accordingly. This can lead to an unhappy bed relationship.
Communication is important
In order to overcome this situation, there must be good communication between couples, they can continue to talk during sexual preparation, and express their wishes and desires more clearly. It is important that they are willing to satisfy each other's wishes. The man's desire to escalate in a short time and satisfy his sexual desire as soon as possible, while the woman's slow and increasingly aroused state may create conflict, and if there is not sufficient communication between them and they cannot talk openly, the satisfaction they desire may not be achieved.
An important point here is the criterion of success in sexuality. Again, we see that this situation It varies from man to man. Contrary to popular belief, a man's feeling of success in sexuality depends on whether his wife is satisfied or not. The man feels successful and happy when his partner reaches sufficient sexual satisfaction.
For the sexual experience to be considered successful for the woman, they must have reached satisfaction. The reason for this is mostly related to the fact that the woman's arousal is more complex and she cannot reach satisfaction in every sexual intercourse.
She counts reaching satisfaction, which does not always occur during sexual intercourse, as success.
Another situation that affects the quality of sexual relationship between couples is the couple's self-confidence and trust in their partners. If a woman or man thinks that they can express everything clearly to their partner and that they enjoy taking care of them, this will help the relationship to be satisfied. If a woman knows that her partner likes to take care of her and can handle her arousal, which can take time, with love and understanding, she will leave herself alone during sex. If the man feels that he is cared for by the woman and that his wishes are met with love and interest by the woman, he will be able to achieve satisfaction during sexuality and behave more attentively towards his partner.
Although there are many factors that affect satisfaction during sexual activity, it is seen that the basis of everything is good communication. , there is mutual interest, love and understanding, and the desire to know each other about sexual satisfaction and for couples to achieve satisfaction.
Read: 0