High/Unrelenting Standards Chart

Some of the following explanations are very familiar to you if you have the High/Unrelenting Standards schema:

• Everything I do has to be the best.

• I have to give my best performance.

• My friends already say I'm very good at … but I still feel inadequate about it.

• I feel like I have to do better.

• Some values ​​are supreme to me, such as being virtuous/humble/egoless/honest/meticulous/rule-abiding/religious .

• When people do not act virtuous/humble/egoless/honest/meticulous/regular/religious, I get very angry, I criticize them, I can argue with them.

• I criticize my child/friend/spouse when they misbehave.

• I often procrastinate on things I need to do because starting them makes me anxious.

• It is useless to go on vacation, watch movies, read novels, have fun. Why should I spare time for these when I can work and produce? If I don't drink, I can't turn off/unwind from my work mode.

• I have problems in my relationships because I spend too much time on my work.

• I have enough time to do the things I want to do. It feels like there is no time.

• I get feedback that I am a perfectionist.

If you have the High Standards chart, you can experience childhood experiences like the one below. you may have:

• My father/mother used to criticize me a lot.

• My father/mother didn't like my work (I thought my work was inadequate/incomplete)

• My school success was the most important thing to my family. They always wanted me to get the highest grades.

• When I got 90 out of 100 in the exam, my parents got mad at me saying "why didn't you get 100".

• My family ; They wanted me to get a high-status profession such as a doctor, teacher, lawyer.

• My family didn't appreciate me very much.

• Only successful I was loved and appreciated when I was.

• I was criticized for even the most harmless behavior, I couldn't act naturally in front of my family.

High How does the standards schema affect your life?

• You always feel stressed and anxious.

• You get frustrated when you don't achieve perfection (which is quite often) You feel anxious and uncomfortable.

• You can't relax; You don't have time to have fun, enjoy, relax.

• So much stress can lead to heart and stomach problems.

• Your lover/spouse/children get overwhelmed by your criticism and move away from you. You will be deprived of the pleasure of bonding with them.

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