People who have needs such as love, attention and living together have always needed another person to meet these basic needs. For this reason, people have experienced close relationships or love, and as a result, there has been the existence of third parties involved in their relationships from time to time.
“Why do people cheat?” Various studies conducted to find the answer to the question show that; In at least 20-25% of marriages, people cheat on their partner at least once. Although this rate varies from culture to culture, the general opinion is that extramarital affairs have a history as long as human history and are quite common in societies.
Although the reasons underlying cheating are tried to be explained by various theories, generally accepted approaches show that the two main factors underlying cheating are gender and marital satisfaction. However, it is observed that the reasons for cheating between men and women are different from each other. While women mostly cheat for "love", it has been determined that the main reason behind men's cheating is "sexuality".
Research shows that; women do not easily deceive the men they decide to spend their lives with. However, women who know or feel that their spouse is cheating on them, who have suffered physical or emotional violence in their marriage, who are neglected and abused by their spouses, also cheat on their spouses at least as much as men. However, social pressure, labeling, exclusion, life safety, etc. For some reason, they feel the need to hide this situation. If women cheat, they usually become attached to the other person and gradually move away from their spouses. In other words, emotional commitment cannot be sustained against both men at the same time.
However, men can easily express cheating because they sometimes perceive cheating as a source of pride, a way of proving themselves, a matter of score, and the society adopts a more permissive attitude. From a social point of view, it is considered an unforgivable situation for a woman to cheat on her husband, while a man's cheating is justified and shown as innocent. Because women either share the cheating event with a very close person or keep it as a "secret" until it is revealed.
This situation is expressed as a difficulty experienced in the studies carried out. In addition, studies show that what really hurts the cheating spouse is the "sexuality" aspect of the job. indicated in some studies. However, it is stated that the deceived person may experience depression due to the trauma experienced after the deception, and accordingly emotional processes such as tantrums, insomnia, feelings of worthlessness, and the desire to take revenge may be experienced.
Men get more angry when they are cheated on and 94% of them do not accept this situation and prefer the way of divorce. Compared to women, men who have been cheated on hide this situation from their surroundings because their masculinity is hurt, and they retaliate immediately after the cheating.
After being cheated on, the person perceives himself as worthless, inadequate, uninteresting and disliked. The person who thinks that he has been wronged does not want to touch his wife and may be emotionally distant from his partner. After cheating, some spouses may decide to continue by reconsidering their relationship with the earthquake caused by this situation. Sometimes, this situation can cause the existing problem in the relationship to be reviewed and resolved, and the relationship to gain a new momentum.
The behavior of cheating, which is generally not welcomed and considered shameful in societies, is also common in Turkish society, which has a more closed and traditional structure recently.
Women, who are a part of society and have a structure that dedicates herself to and serves her family, are in an effort to realize herself today. This situation causes people's desire to continue their relationship to be related to the satisfaction they get from the relationship, and in a sense, cheating is normalized in today's conditions.
The evaluations show that; our society There is not much research on this subject, which is of great interest to us. In order to ensure the continuity of our traditional social structure and to raise healthy and happy generations at the same time, it is thought that the social and psychological dimension of the incident should be evaluated very well by examining this serious increase in cheating incidents in recent years.
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