'Let there be some space between all this togetherness and the winds of heaven can blow and circulate between you.
Love each other, but do not place binding agreements on love. Let love be a sea that churns with tides between the shores of your hearts.
Sing, dance, have fun, but remember that you are both alone. Because even though the music that sounds is the same, the notes that make it up are different.
Always be next to each other, but do not get too close to each other. Because the columns that carry the temple are also separate, and a cypress and an oak do not grow in each other's shadow.'
Halil CIBRAN wrote these about marriage.
When we talk about marriage and close relationships, we mean this closeness. We may be exaggerating a bit. We like closeness at the level of emotion and thought, but this closeness; It gets annoying when it comes to issues such as planning our time, who we will meet or not, who we can be friends with, what we will eat and drink. We feel constrained, limited, and perhaps even controlled. This; It may seem to us that our own self is being eroded and our existence is becoming insignificant. We think that we are living the life our spouse wants and that we care about his or her preferences and priorities.
The same goes for our spouse. He may be thinking and feeling similar things.
At this point, it would be right for us to review the distance between us. We don't have to do everything together, go everywhere together, or attend all kinds of events together. We should be able to leave distances between us where the winds of heaven can blow and wander.
These distances should not mean that each other lives different lives. I am talking about a distance that will not disrupt the unique togetherness texture of marriage. Not separation, distance, otherness. Just like dancing: in a certain rhythm and with oscillations in accordance with the music…
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