Reward: Given for performing a behavior; It is a pleasurable material opportunity (such as a gift, chocolate, hamburger, toy) or a right granted to a child (such as taking them to the cinema, allowing them to play on a tablet).
The child is usually promised in advance to perform the desired and expected behavior. The child does the behavior and deserves the reward. However, over time, the reward creates addiction in the child. The child only performs the desired behavior to get the reward, not because he really believes that he should do that behavior:
-If I study my lesson today, you will buy me the toy I want, right?
The child who is used to constantly receiving rewards is materialistic. It happens, he expects a response for every action he does:
-If I don't fight with Aslı today, what will you get me?
Over time, the reward will increase its appeal. and since it has lost its effect, parents have to change it and find a more effective reward:
-I used to buy a wafer when he did his lesson. Now the wafer is no longer useful.
*In educating children, appreciation and encouragement are more important than rewards. Because over time, the effect of the reward disappears, but the child repeats that behavior to hear his mother's appreciation. Therefore, reward should be used in the beginning and in moderation, and should be replaced by appreciation, positive emotions and encouragement as the behavior continues.
Points to Consider in Appreciation and Praise;
There is a very important point that we should pay attention to when we use words of praise and appreciation to show that we appreciate the child's acceptable behavior; Praise and appreciation are related to the child's efforts, skills, that is, his behavior or results, rather than his personality.
Let's say; Hakan (age 8) tidied up his room after playing;
Instead of "Well done Hakan, you are a very neat and clean child"; We can say, "Your room was very messy, I congratulate you on how quickly you tidied up your room."
For example, qualities and adjectives such as "You are a very good child" limit the child's freedom of movement because they frame the child with the perception of being "well-behaved" and refer to him/her. With the fear that the adjective or quality given may turn out to be unfounded, the child tends to either constantly play the good part or to secretly do the mischief he/she wants to do, which creates feelings of uneasiness and anxiety in the child.
Read: 0
