Many of us are actually very prejudiced about anger, which is one of the basic emotions in humans. In fact, we can say that the problem is not anger but the uncontrolled experience of anger. In other words, if anger can be controlled and experienced according to need; It is an emotion that energizes a person, provides relief, allows people to draw boundaries or take what they can get from life.
When a person is born, he is born neutral or bipolar, as in all matters. In other words, he remains angry or calm when needed, depending on changing circumstances, but later, due to the thoughts and beliefs attributed to him or the experiences we have had, some of us make records that anger is bad and dangerous. Some of us realize that it is an emotion that can be used and useful when necessary.
Sometimes, we register that we should not be angry with our loved ones and begin to live limitlessly, defenseless only towards them. Some of us react to the anger of the models we watched in early childhood and try to "prune our branches and live without any anger." Some of us live with short-circuit potential in anger due to unfinished business and trauma.
The basic principle in anger control is; It means going back to the beginning, that is, gaining the ability to get angry as needed from a neutral position. Polar thinking, that is, accepting that everything exists with its polarity and taking responsibility for the bad as well as the good, can give you a natural anger, resistance and tolerance. For example, if you are an over-giving person, your expectations, disappointment and risk of outburst of anger increases. Or if you are an extremely calm person and cannot use your anger at all, you need to be ready for sudden explosions or anxiety disorders.
Apart from this, situations and traumas that maintain the unfinished energy. Gaining awareness can prevent you from short-circuiting your anger when you encounter these situations. . This awareness gained should be integrated into life step by step through experiments.
Note: in this article, I did not mention anger problems arising from psychiatric conditions.
Read: 0
