Children enter the process of becoming individuals starting from the age of 3. It also brings with it the skills to become an individual, to grow, to engage in social behavior appropriate to one's age, and to meet one's needs. Growth is not only about increasing physical height and weight, but also about being able to behave emotionally appropriate to one's age.
In order for the child to learn to behave age-appropriately, parents should provide opportunities for the development of the child's skills and prepare a suitable environment, trust the child, and the child should trust himself. They need to pay attention to basic principles such as setting rules and limits, acting decisively and consistently, and spend sufficient and quality time with the child to ensure mutual satisfaction.
In cases where rules and boundaries are not clear, the child is not given the opportunity to develop and instead In overprotective families where all their needs are met, it is observed that children grow up physically and with age, but they cannot mature emotionally and behave like a child younger than their age.
* What are the common underlying reasons for not wanting to grow up?
When the child's needs are not met sufficiently, it is seen that the child returns to previous developmental periods. When children have difficulty expressing their wishes and needs, they show this with their behavior.
The most obvious way this is seen is by attracting attention by acting younger than their age. Life events such as the arrival of a new sibling, overprotective parental attitude, separations, incompatibilities, illness, death, school failure, taking on some tasks instead of the child, and treating the child as if he were younger than his age are all situations that cause children to experience flashbacks.
In these situations, children may experience behaviors such as bedwetting, baby talk, thumb sucking, and not wanting to separate from their mother.
* What are the effects of not wanting to grow up on the socialization process?
A child who behaves age-appropriately in social environments and can establish harmonious relationships with both peers and adults is seen as a socially harmonious individual. However, he is not yet fully matured psychologically, Children who resist growing up cannot fully establish appropriate social relationships with either their peers or adults. Children who show behavioral symptoms such as bedwetting, baby talk, thumb sucking, and not leaving their mother are children who can easily be mocked and hurt by their peers.
These children do not have the psychological maturity to solve a problem when they encounter it. Instead of appropriate solution methods, they exhibit the behaviors of a child younger than their age. For this reason, they may have difficulty making friends and joining a group.
* How does this reflect on their educational life?
About growing up A resistant child may experience various difficulties in terms of academic skills and social relations in his/her educational life. In the academic field, problems such as difficulty in gaining the responsibility of studying and doing homework, and having parents do their homework may be observed.
From the perspective of social relations, they may receive frequent warnings from their teachers because their sense of responsibility is not sufficiently developed.
* How should and how should parents approach their children who do not want to grow up?
-
Parents should first carefully examine their children's personality traits and develop developmental skills. They should follow their periods closely. They should give age-appropriate levels of responsibility, taking into account what skills they have at what age and what they can do, and they should follow this and guide and help the child when he or she has difficulty.
-
Divorce, loss, school failure. Attention should be paid to the quality of communication established with the child in life events such as the birth of a new sibling, and it should be taken into account that the child needs more attention during these periods.
-
Overprotective, parents do the work for the child instead of the child. In a family environment where children do the necessary work, their "growth" is delayed. For this reason, the child should be given responsibilities appropriate to his age.
-
Baby behavior is not accepted and he/she should behave in accordance with his/her age. The message should be given that their behavior will be accepted.
* When is expert help needed?
When children do not exhibit age-appropriate behavior, parents should first They should review their own attitudes. Even if the communication and time spent with the child is of high quality, there are no problems with eating and sleeping routines, there is no vital crisis, and babyishness is not reinforced, it is appropriate to seek help from an expert when the child exhibits age-inappropriate behavior.
Read: 0
