While relaxing your body and mind with the sounds of birds and waves at a beach; Self-compassion is the feeling you feel when you feel that calmness is good and you deserve more. Remember the warmth of the sun warming your face, wrapping your legs, and the serenity you felt as you inhaled the scent of seaweed and salt water with the cries of the birds. How often or how many times do you experience this serenity in your life? How well do you master the needs of your mind and body? When listing needs, which ones do you prioritize and which do you leave out? But do you know how much you need the ones you don't have?
There have been times when you have been harshly critical of yourself. A part of you protects you and tells you that you don't deserve these criticisms. On the one hand, he continues to prove what he is right in criticism and to present hypotheses. Think of the voice of the side that says you don't deserve it and softens the criticism like the volume button on the TV. Remember such a moment, what level does that sound correspond to between zero and twenty? In another example, at what level of zero to twenty would you rate the integrity of your self-care? The answer to these is largely proportional to how often you hug yourself with compassion. You may ask yourself what is hugging? Depression cardigan, depression socks, depression blanket, quilt, lover… These are the things you need to keep you whole when you feel low, to prevent you from falling apart, to wrap you up, in short. Basically, these actions or materials that feed your sense of compassion help you feel good. It envelops your shattered heart, confused mind, clouded senses. We need them when we feel bad in concrete terms. What if I told you that you always need a feeling of compassion and it's called self-compassion? This feeling, which you feel intensely when we break up, is something powerful enough to help you not feel so confused and messy when you break up, if you can actively use it in your life. Think of it like exercising. When someone who has made exercise into his life lifts a heavy load; When someone who has never exercised in their life is going to lift a heavy load, they both have to fight the weight. The response will be different. The person who has never exercised will feel heavier and may experience muscle aches afterwards. The exerciser will feel the same weight but manageable and will not experience any pain afterwards. Here, the compassion you put into your daily life will help you get through difficult times more easily and meet more manageable.
Self-compassion is creating space for yourself, it allows you to give importance to self-care. Maybe you can think of: I don't have time for this in all the stress and stress. I am in trouble to feed my stomach, I am in trouble of shelter, I am suffering from love, I have economic problems, I am in conflict with my family, my wife and my brother, I have enemies, etc. I have problems such as, this is a luxury thing for me, you can say that I can't think of myself, and you can take it to the point of selfish thinking. That's exactly why you need it. You need it to perform better in the ring called life, to put on your best dance show on the ice rink. In order to cope better with difficulties and cope with stress, you need to meet your need for self-compassion.
What am I going to do, you may ask? I can show you how to do it, not what to do. Because you are unique and only you know you best. You are not a mold to fit certain rules. At the beginning of the article, I created an imagination for you, if you like and imagine this scene, 5 minutes on a very simple beach. You can even open a space for yourself to create the reality of this. Is there no beach, then imagine. Imagination is the most miraculous thing ever given to us. Close your eyes and imagine anything good for you. Think of all the details in a way that appeals to all your senses. You can make a list of things that are good for you. Impossibles can be in it, that's why we have imagination. Don't forget the fact that you can make mistakes in life, hug yourself and listen to yourself. You can ask the metaphor of the volume level on your remote from time to time to check yourself. The more you see, the more people around you will be able to hear and understand you better. Because first of all, you will have heard and understood yourself.
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