Coping with the loss of a loved one or loved one is quite painful. As a result of this loss, we enter a deep mourning process and become unable to enjoy life. We have difficulty doing simple daily activities such as waking up in the morning, eating, going to work, and shopping. However, depending on the grief we experience, we give emotional, physical, intellectual and behavioral reactions. For example, we may react emotionally with shock and sadness, physically with a feeling of emptiness in the stomach, tightness in the heart, shortness of breath, disbelief due to mental pain, and sleep and eating disorders due to distraction and behavioral pain. The word "bereavement", which means mourning in English, is derived from the word "berafian", which originally meant "to steal". When this word is later used instead of "mourning", it means "When someone we love dies, it feels like our life has been stolen from us." thought prevailed. Mourning exists in all cultures and is a universal phenomenon. While in some cultures, mourning requires getting out of daily life; In some, it causes spiritual meaning.
Just as all emotions have a function, grief also has an important function. For example, while the emotion of fear enables us to avoid dangers and survive, grief enables us to say goodbye to losses and move on with life. Therefore, mourning is a natural response to loss. But often people hinder the healthy grieving process. They do not want to talk about their dead relatives or those they have lost. Because this is very painful. But sometimes thinking about a very real and debilitating issue like death and understanding that it is a natural part of life can be useful in accepting the positive.
Freud touched upon the process of saying goodbye to losses in his article "Mourning and Melancholy" (1917). The word loss first reminds us of death. The ending of a relationship is also a loss. So, we can think of separation as a loss process. According to Freud, during the healthy mourning process, a person performs a grief work. In this process, the self decides that the lost person or object no longer exists and the energy is withdrawn from this person or object.
There are some stages of the grieving process. Work on death and mourning According to psychiatrist Elisabeth Kübler-Ross (1969), there are five main stages of grief. These are: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. Since everyone's loss is unique, the mourning process may be different for each person. For this reason, not every individual who experiences loss has to experience these stages in order or may not experience some stages. In the first stage, denial, life begins to seem meaningless and empty. Anger, the second stage of grief, is essential to the healing process. Even if you have anger that seems endless, you need to be willing to confront it. During the third mourning period, we try to negotiate. Before loss there is a bargain. The final stage, acceptance, is not about being completely okay or being at peace with the loss. At this stage, the physical absence of the missing person is accepted. The person does not like this situation, but he tries to learn to live with it. We cannot replace what was lost, but we begin to build new relationships. We start to hold on to life again. We must give the mourning process the necessary time to start living again.
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