SOCIOLOGICAL EFFECTS THAT TURN NEEDS INTO ADDICTION
Change and transformation are the basic needs of humans. Progress is possible through renewal. The new gives us energy and motivation and makes us feel good. It is natural to meet our physiological, psychological and sociological needs as needed. Every object has a usage period. If it can no longer function, it is time to get a new one.
Over the course of the last hundred years, wars, famine, economic and political crises kept the general society at the poverty line until four generations ago. Both the underdevelopment of the industry and the weakness of purchasing power make it impossible to meet even basic needs such as eating, drinking and clothing. Brother and sister's clothes that had become too small were kept for the brother, shoes bought from holiday to holiday caused sleeplessness, torn trousers were patched, and items were repaired and used over and over again. Dreams and goals were set for a place to go, a shirt to buy, a book to buy, and money was saved for this. With the acceleration of industrialization, income levels have increased, the ability to meet needs has reached a human level, and society has begun to breathe. However, in order to turn the wheel of the capital system, it has captured the insatiable side of man with the statement "needs are unlimited". The individual who works for more is caught in this cruel wheel, spending more and more on his need for pleasure to relieve his difficulty and fatigue, and working more and more as he spends. While this system, which objectifies and even mechanizes people, is insatiable like a monster, the needs are never stopped and the prices paid are never stopped.
In our time when neurotic and even hysterical individuals are rampant, consumption frenzy increases insatiability and thus impudence. Waking up almost every morning and encountering a better product, a higher model phone, higher version electronic devices, or the new design of a popular brand devalues what you have and makes you ambitious for new goals. So, it is not us who determine what we need, the system imposes it on us on our behalf by influencing our consciousness and subconscious through advertising, social media, and the social environment.
How to Identify Real Needs?
Watching for signals of need: Need for something When the signal you hear comes, for example, when you pass by a shop window and think that autumn is coming and you need to buy shoes suitable for the season, you need to stop and think about whether you really need it. The signal must motivate us to take action to solve a real problem. Does the signal that you should eat cake at the cafe where you go for coffee really indicate your need for dessert, or will you make someone eat it for pleasure at that moment and regret it later? We should be able to follow this and decide accordingly.
If it is a signal imposed on us without realizing it, this is not a real need. It is our real need that comes from within us and that will solve a problem and provide relief. For this reason, stopping and even waiting for a while and making a decision will help separate the needs.
Determining the size of the need: There are short-term and long-term needs. Eating is a short-term need, going on vacation is a medium-term need, and buying a house is a long-term need. The idea of buying a house to get rid of rent may overshadow other basic needs, so the whole process should be evaluated carefully.
Are the needs parallel to the purpose and goals of life?: If we want to get a good education, we cannot spend the time and effort we need in the shopping mall or on Instagram explore pages. If we want to grow the company, we cannot replace our car with a higher model. Our needs must be our priority, otherwise we will create a chaotic process and feel unhappy and unproductive.
Of course, for this, we must determine ourselves, our goals, objectives and priorities well and act according to our own center. Otherwise, following imposed needs will result in nothing but wear and tear.
Human nature is a structure that can distort the truth in line with its desires and deceive itself and those around it with many excuses. Here, first of all, being honest with ourselves and responding to needs by taking into account all conditions guarantees long-term peace and happiness instead of short-term pleasure.
PSYCHOLOGICAL EFFECTS THAT TURN NEEDS INTO ADDICTION
Uncontrollable shopping addiction, defined as "the habit of spending money regardless of need or purchasing power", is becoming widespread. It will meet all your needs in the wardrobe Feeling the desire to buy new clothes or shoes even though you already have them, buying three different colors of a jacket, constantly changing your phone to a higher model, not being able to show willpower in this process and regretting it immediately are listed in the literature as shopping addiction. Just like gambling addiction or alcohol addiction, it is an impulse control disorder and a psychiatric/psychological problem. The unconscious system, which sends signals to us through impulse when we are hungry and waits for us to be full and calm down, is in trouble again. But he is trying to fill a void that was not satisfied in childhood or in the past, not a natural need. Of course, a need cannot be satisfied by anything else. Just like if we are sleepy, we cannot meet this need by drinking water.
The individual, who has not discovered his own basic structure and requirements, tries to alleviate the emptiness caused by the worthlessness, inadequacy, lovelessness, and trauma that he has been carrying deep inside from the past, by using addictions to cigarettes, gambling, work, or shopping. But unless this black hole is filled with what he really needs, he looks for more temporary satisfaction. This impulse, which appears as “craving” or “deprivation”, triggers a momentary pleasure and then feelings of regret, guilt and anger.
The soul is inherent, it is satisfied by completing itself!
Where does the tendency towards addiction come from?
Regardless of its type, the foundations of an addictive structure are formed in childhood and even infancy. The basic need of a human baby coming into the world is to be safe. The baby, who lives as a whole with the mother for up to 6-7 months, begins the process of individualization from then on. If healthy attachment and individuation with the mother takes place, secure attachment is achieved; otherwise, the baby who is anxiously attached to the mother tends to be anxiously attached to life and all its relationships. Insecurity and anxiety, which are generalized to this life, and the gap created by this are tried to be filled with addictions. These purchases and dependent actions made to appear self-confident, competent and superior, on the contrary, cause the person to become alienated from himself and feel worthless. The vicious circle continues like this.
The spiritual emptiness, hopelessness, worthlessness and inadequacy at the basis of addiction, avoiding taking responsibility for one's own life, excessive Stress, fear of feeling emotions, not being able to cope with the uncertainty of life, not being an individual, remaining an emotional child, hunger for love, need for approval and acceptance can make the individual addicted to a substance or action.
Parents who are overly controlling, unable to control their anger, displaying angry freedom (not caring, ignoring), and excessive freedom (not providing limits and discipline) during childhood form this structure.
Whatever the reason, the responsibility of the adult individual is to know, mature and improve himself.
If the problem is at the level of addiction, if your credit card limit is exceeded, if you buy new clothes even though your closets are full, if you run to shopping malls whenever you feel unhappy, if the things you buy lose their value in a short time, if you feel good one moment and restless the next, you can consider addiction professionally. You can get support.
Even if it has not reached the level of addiction, you feel valuable and respected as you spend money and acquire new things, you get angry because of what you cannot get, you open up new areas of spending while worrying about your spouse working too much and not spending time on family and romantic areas, and you open up new areas of spending for your friends. If you emulate what you have or the influencers you follow on Instagram, it means you cannot reach yourself while escaping from the black hole within you.
Self-control means having will. It means being able to calculate one's own reality and necessity. It means being able to understand their wishes and needs and fulfill them accordingly.
So it means growing.
Growing up is the ability to take responsibility for your life despite all the shortcomings, gaps, and bruises, and the ability to live without running away, hiding, holding on to addictions, or being ruined by temporary pleasures. Being able to control yourself means being sincere enough to indulge sometimes, patient enough to postpone pleasure, wise enough to calculate your own real needs, and being brave enough to say no.
The new sweets we buy brighten your packaging while overshadowing the real hunger of your soul. And we make mistakes by thinking that what we do is a need. The end of every mistake is disappointment.
What you give up is not yourself, but the addiction that holds you captive. May you be warm.
With love…
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