Some situations and behaviors that families sometimes have difficulty coping with and managing can occur in various areas of life. When psychosocial development stages are examined, especially in the preschool period, it is possible to encounter some age-specific behaviors. In order to gain independence between the ages of 1.5 and 3, it is possible to encounter behaviors such as showing things that one can do on their own, trying to do things on their own without asking for help, and being forced. During this time, the child makes an effort to control his own body and movements. He wants to make new experiments and may refuse your help because he wants to achieve this himself. At this stage, if age-appropriate experiments are safely encouraged and the child is given space, this will contribute positively to the child's willingness to experience new experiences at later ages. Otherwise, the child may feel inadequate and begin to doubt his own abilities. Unless he receives the support he expects regarding what he is going to do, he may express different emotions. Following this process, between the ages of 3-6, the child begins to experiment with what he can do as an individual. Curiosity comes to the fore. Makes attempts to achieve some goals and objectives. He continues to understand different roles and experiment with those roles by performing role-plays. When they try and achieve some things that they could not do on their own before, their self-confidence is supported by the pleasure of this. For example, the child now attempts to meet other children himself when he goes to the park. If the family supports this situation, the child will gain self-confidence in terms of social skills. Initiative will be supported within the goals and objectives. However, if the family prevents this and approaches with an attitude such as 'don't talk to other foreign children in the park', feelings such as shame or guilt may come into play and avoid taking the initiative. Therefore, when the child is not supported and encouraged appropriately in the two stages mentioned above, or sometimes tries to do dangerous things that are not appropriate for his age (which can sometimes be to attract attention, it is important to distinguish well in determining the appropriate reaction), he will feel hindered and experience self-doubt and guilt. can feel happiness. Sometimes, challenging behaviors such as overcoming the obstacle in what they are trying to do or persistently trying something that is not allowed may appear as a part of the developmentally experienced situation in the process.
However, insistently asking for something or having requests accepted by force and insistence. It can become an ongoing pattern in some families. Here, the family's consistent response to these requests within the framework of their own rules is one of the factors that most affects this process. Because as uncertainties arise, the child realizes the situations that the family has difficulty in managing and can turn this into an opportunity to meet their own wishes. He can sometimes push the limits of insistence by clinging to the fact that his wishes come true as a result of insistence.
Especially in this situation;
*when parents are busy,
*when he/she is on the phone,
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*they need to send e-mails,
*they are trying to organize work-related situations,
*they are in a crowded environment,
*they are at home It may occur frequently at times such as in a regulatory or guest hosting environment.
As just mentioned, children have an idea of in which situations their parents have difficulty and give up, and they can choose a behavior accordingly and persistently express their wishes in busy situations.
These requests may sometimes be requests for extra TV-tablet-phone time that is not normally allowed at that time, and sometimes there may be other situations that are not allowed at that time according to family rules.
SO, WHAT IS APPROPRIATE TO DO?
*Family rules are determined in advance, and when necessary, use pictures or writing appropriate to the age of the child. It can be concretized with (it can be used for reminder purposes when necessary).
*It can be used at that moment by determining a symbol, sign or word to be used when he/she asks you for something in a stuck situation (so that the child can hear what he/she says). He realizes that he is being listened to, but that he needs to wait a bit for this request).
*After the situation regarding the insistence encountered, he is calm and open to communication. Talking to the child clearly, sharing your feelings, explaining the problem in a clear way without confusing him/her will contribute positively to your communication and relationship in the future, and you may have the chance to create a strategy for the future regarding the situation.
** It should not be forgotten that allowing these demands at some times and not at other times is an expression of inconsistency, and later on, he may try to seize the chance he has at some times by increasing the intensity of his insistence. Therefore, following the previous stars, understanding the child's emotions, providing appropriate behavioral frameworks, and giving them space to express their wishes at appropriate times will make it easier to cope. Planning enjoyable activities will be helpful for children who sometimes cannot keep themselves busy due to their age or the environment they live in and make persistent demands.
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