1-)What is Secure Attachment?
The sustained emotional bond formed by the tendency to seek and maintain intimacy with a particular figure, especially in stressful situations-Bowlby
It is the constant emotional bond between the child and her mother.-Ainsworth
This bond that starts to develop between the baby and the caregiver/mother in the first years of life, the caregiver's sensitivity to the signals in the baby, its presence when needed, the emotional support of the child. By accepting and giving positive reactions, the caregiver becomes a safe harbor for the child. By learning to trust, the child begins to explore his environment.
According to Bowbly, the quality of the attachment relationship serves as a prototype for all future social relationships. The foundations of attachment that the child develops in the first years of his life also form the basis of lifelong relationships.
Children who grow up in a safe environment develop empathy skills and become more resistant to social and emotional stresses. This bond that starts to develop between the baby and the caregiver/mother in the first years of life, the caregiver's sensitivity to the signals in the baby (such as crying, smiling), being present when needed, accepting the child emotionally and giving positive reactions, the caregiver provides a safe environment for the child. becomes a port. The child learns to trust and begins to explore his environment.
Do children who are raised with a lot of love achieve secure attachment? It's not enough.
The 4 key attributes of attachment:
Safe Shelter: Attachment for comfort and security in times of danger and fear to be able to take shelter in the figure
Safe Harbor: the safe movements of the attachment figure so that the child can explore the environment; exploration of the environment and other relationships in the presence of the attachment figure
Maintaining Closeness: Desire to be close to the people with whom one is attached; expecting close people to be physically close as well
Pain of Separation: Concern in the absence of attachment figure
2-)When Does Secure Attachment Start, How Does It Form?
During pregnancy, attachment begins in the womb. The mother's desire for her baby, her readiness for her, her feelings about her baby are recorded in the baby's records. The feelings felt for a desired baby are recorded as being wanted in the body records by the hormone system. The attachment of the baby to the womb in the mother's womb is also related to the fact that it is desired to develop in a healthy way, to be contacted and communicated. This situation also determines the behavior and attitude; With healthy eating, safety and protective behaviors, the mother takes care of herself and conveys the message that she is wanted.
- The baby has a need.
- The baby cries.
- Care satisfies the needs that give.
How she is treated lays the groundwork for how to treat herself and the world
The need for attachment is vital, since it is related to the survival instinct, children are attached regardless of parental style.
3-) How Does Not Having Secure Attachment How People View Their Self and The World? Influences?
Childhood attachment style shapes how you perceive yourself and other people, the world. Lack of secure attachment causes the person to perceive others and the outside world as dangerous.
- I am not safe
- People are unreliable
- The outside world is dangerous
- I can't trust anyone, I can't get help
- I am worthless, unloved, bad person.
- Nothing I say or do has any effect on myself-others-situations
- Emotions are bad, I shouldn't show my feelings-Don't trust my feelings
4-)How Do Secure and Insecure Attachment Styles Reflect on Relationships?
Individuals with secure attachments, In the absence of a disturbing situation, they can establish intimacy with an attitude that can receive-give love and lives in sustainable relationships.
He/she can show his/her feelings and soothe him/her. They can form deep strong bonds.
Those with insecure attachments; Since he has a dangerous perception of others and the outside world, he experiences uneasiness for no apparent reason. He interprets a minor setback as abandonment or separation. They live and live in restlessness as if something is going to go wrong at any moment. He says that since his needs are not consistently taken care of, he must handle everything alone, on the assumption that he will not be taken care of. Even in relationships, they feel lonely and tired. She hides her emotions, represses them, or is dependent on the relationship to calm down. They make superficial connections.
5-) If Secure Attachment Has Not Formed, Is It Possible to Compensate Later?
The first minutes of birth are the moments when mother-baby bonding starts with body-eye contact. . Secure attachment When the baby comes to the new world from the mother's womb, the familiar, familiar safe place should be given to the mother's lap by skin-to-skin contact in the first welcome. When it comes to a situation related to the health of the baby, it can be separated from the mother with the incubator process. This situation can cause loneliness, restlessness and anxiety in the new world. If the mother's bond needed for the baby to feel safe has not been met, it is possible to compensate for the familiar mother's voice with touches, with plenty of awning contact applications and the phrases you are safe when it comes to reunion.(It has a healing effect for both the baby and the mother).
even if it is not established, the rescuing attachment figures are compensatory in the child's life. and established relationships are a determining factor. If there is no secure attachment, there is no feeling of security, there is no perception of security, so there will often be anxiety, uneasiness, and the need for control. The necessary foundation for vital functions during and after birth, for healthy development in infancy and childhood, for development in life with a sense of peace and security, self-realization and establishing healthy relationships in adulthood and beyond. It is a stone.
It is a solid, comfortable chair that you sit on.
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