“Love” is a state of feeling good, but it is actually a morbid state of happiness. Like a psychiatric disease, it is actually a pathological condition that includes obsession, hyperactivity, decreased appetite and sleep, and repetitive and meaningless movements. Moreover, its lifespan is only 3-18 months and there is pain at the end. Like all other recreational substances (cigarettes, alcohol, cocaine, etc.), it causes addiction and withdrawal syndrome.
So why do we want “love”? To torture ourselves? Of course not.
For the continuation of the tour, for the reward, and for its stress-reducing effect. Love has always existed since Adam and Eve. When we look at history, even in many social events, there is sometimes a love story that pulls the trigger.
In terms of both Turkish and Western languages, the origin of the word, its cultural, dynamic and psychological meaning is to fulfill a longing, a deficiency and to provide a certain sensory stimulus. It is obvious that. Therefore, “love” is closely related to both reward and pleasure-related phenomena, as well as appetite and addictive behaviors. The biology of the “love” phenomenon, especially its neurobiological aspects, has recently begun to attract attention. It is known that love relationships and the concept of attachment to which they are closely related are important in health and disease. Available data show that love and affectionate relationships are complex, neurobiological phenomena based on limbic system (primitive brain) activation. These processes include oxytocin, adrenaline, dopamine and serotonergic functions. Endorphin, endogenous opiate systems and nitric oxide also play a role in these processes. Different stages of love and affection relationships show different neurochemical and neurophysiological properties and may partially overlap with maternal, romantic and sexual love and attachment. In other words: the localization of the love felt for a lover, mother, an object or food in the brain is in the same place.
The phenomenological view of love and affection relationships may change over time and sub-stages such as mutual attraction, romance, power struggles that can occur within the relationship and mature love. It is thought that it may occur.
Compassion is defined in dictionaries as "loving with pity and/or protection, compassion". In love, there is passionate attachment, intense desire and lust. both k Abram also contains many emotions intertwined. Brain areas related to love and affection, neurotransmitters, pheromones (smell) and hormones, and cellular changes are the important topics in the focus of research. It has been understood that oxytocin, in particular, is associated with sexual and reproductive behavior and plays an important role in providing affectionate, sincere, close and affectionate bonds. Differences between genders have also been shown in studies conducted with brain scans of individuals in love. For example, it has been shown that in women, there is activation in the areas related to instincts, attention and memory circuits, and in men, in the areas where visuality is processed. Considering the importance of the anterior commissure and corpus callosum in terms of data exchange between the right and left brain hemispheres, it can be said that women can process sexual data more holistically than men. In addition, although it has been reported that the thickness of the cerebral cortex is different between the two genders, the practical meaning of these differences is not yet known. In studies investigating whether decision-making abilities in conflicting situations differ between genders, it has been observed that men take the current framework into consideration when solving problems, while women often turn to solutions independent of the framework of the problem. It is thought that the left frontal cortex plays a more prominent role in choices that depend on the frame in which the problem occurs, while the right frontal cortex plays a more prominent role in choices independent of this frame. Therefore, it can be said that in love relationships, especially in cases where the available social data are contradictory, men and women may differ in terms of the brain areas they activate and the coping methods they use when solving problems, and these propositions need to be evaluated with future brain imaging studies.
There may be a general decrease in frontal cortex activity during sexual arousal, orgasm, love and affectionate relationships, which may be compatible with at least a temporary suspension of cognitive abilities, especially executive functions. Activity seen in the frontal lobe during love and affectionate relationships The increase seems to be accompanied by a decrease in activity in the parietal and temporal lobes and the amygdala. It is known that the amygdala is activated by fearful stimuli. Therefore, the decrease in the activity of this region observed in the studies conducted so far, when subjects of both sexes are watching their beloved partners or during ejaculation in male subjects, may reflect a decrease in fear/behavioral inhibition. The front part of our brain, which we call the Frontal region, regulates our daily life according to social rules and suppresses the warnings coming from the brain region that contains our primitive urges (eating, drinking, sexuality), which we call the limbic system. In other words, it is the frontal region that suppresses us from making love in public. The naughty child of our brain is the limbic system, and the head teacher is the frontal cortex. Thus, the suppression of the activity of the frontal lobe may be related to the suppression of negative emotions observed during love and affectionate relationships. So, as the saying "love knows no rules" expresses very well, the person who is in love loses control. For these reasons, the decrease in the effectiveness of these areas that can be observed during love and affection relationships and which may be specific only to the loved individual/relatives may be compatible with the increase in trust in the partner during the relationship. After the love affair ends, people say, "HOW DID I TOLERATE THIS MAN/WOMAN?"
Studies conducted so far have shown that the decrease in serotonin secretion observed in the early stages of romantic love may be equivalent to that in patients diagnosed with OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder). A recent study shows that a decrease in serotonin secretion may also increase risky choices. For this reason, it has been suggested that changes in serotonin secretion may contribute to obsessive and/or impulsive behaviors that can be seen to different extents and stages in love and affection relationships. While the repetitive thoughts and behaviors observed in these relationships (such as checking the phone screen at all times to see if there is a message) occur with dopaminergic overactivity, serotonin synthesis changes are observed in a subgroup where these behaviors are experienced as foreign to the self. In this respect, most love and affection relationships occur in some of the children and adolescents receiving stimulant drug treatment. It resembles repetitive thoughts and behaviors experienced in harmony with the self and self.
In conclusion, if we were to summarize what we wrote with a love story:
While sitting in a cafe, you see a guy and you like him. The amygdala of the brain immediately activates and creates fear. You think, "This man won't look at me." For a moment, the man raises his head and looks at you. Here's what happens, and when the looks begin, oxytocin begins to be released. “oxytocin” is that miraculous hormone that is released during motherhood and breastfeeding, creating a sense of confidence and suppressing social phobia. Oxytocin immediately suppresses the amygdala and tells you to relax. Oxytocin is a “meeting, liking” hormone. Your anxiety decreases, your memory deteriorates and you become "sails in the water". When the first meeting and physical interactions begin, dopamine, a pleasure hormone, comes into play and the pleasure period begins. As you get pleasure, you start to repeat the pleasurable behaviors like a hamstring spinning a wheel. Stereotypic (repetitive) behaviors emerge. Hanging around him, suddenly appearing in front of him, spending the time you are not sleeping on the phone, suspending your entire social life, the period of your friend's reproaches... As a result of repetitive pleasures and behaviors, dopamine receptors in the brain increase, increase and eventually tolerance develops. So it's like alcoholism. In order to get drunk, you have to increase the amount of alcohol. Because the dopamine receptors in the brain have increased so much that the amount of dopamine released cannot saturate the receptors; Just like your lover is not enough for you anymore.
Your lover, who gave you pleasure at the beginning of your relationship, made you shine, and was your soulmate, has now turned into a different person. That skin scent that you like so much is now bothering you. This time, the "you have changed a lot, my love" period begins. . Because the dopamine receptors in the brain have increased so much that the dopamine released is not enough, and therefore the pleasure you get decreases. And; The life of love, which is focused on pleasure, lust and reward, is over.
If your relationship can end in marriage, love is over again, but it has been replaced by habit and affection
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