We know that the majority of parents attach great importance to report cards. There are families who think that they can understand their child's success, interest and interest in classes by the grade they see on the report card. Recently, the number of parents sharing their children's report cards on social media has increased. Aside from parents who are proud to show that their child is successful, parents of children who bring unsuccessful report cards are extremely badly affected by this. Yes, everyone wants their child to be successful, but the difference comes in the way they want it.
Telling the child who brought an unsuccessful report card, 'We got what you wanted, we sent you to the best schools, you still bring this report card' will not increase the child's success in the next report card. It also adds feelings of guilt and inadequacy. The report card period can negatively affect the relationship between mother/father and child in some families. During this period, it is of great importance to convey to the child who receives the report card (regardless of whether he is successful or unsuccessful) that he is loved unconditionally. In other words, it is important to convey to the child the feeling that no matter what your report card is like, we love you and the report card has no effect on our love for you.
The family's attitude during the report card period is completely reflected on the child. If the family is very anxious, this anxiety is passed on to the child. This is entirely related to the way the family evaluates the report card. Children of families who attach great meaning to the grades on the report card begin to see the report card as an indicator of their own values.
So, How Should I Treat My Child on Report Card Day?
-First of all, it is necessary to start from the area in which he is successful, talk about it and congratulate him. There is a difference between thanking and congratulating. We do not need to thank you because our expectation is not children who strive to be successful because their families want them, but children who have internalized their responsibilities.
- After discussing the successes, we should talk about the low grades and ask the child's opinion about why the grades are low. and what they say should be listened to carefully. At the next stage, parents can brainstorm with their children and set goals on how to be more successful. At this point, it is important for the child to feel the support of the family.
- Depending on the success of the report card, The love and interest towards the child should not be reduced/increased.
-Comparison with older sister/brother, brother or friend should never be made. Each child is special and unique and should be evaluated within himself/herself.
-The set goals should be in direct proportion to the child's capacity and abilities. Giving the child more responsibility than he can handle does not increase success, on the contrary, it brings failure.
-You should not label the child. Statements such as 'You are lazy, you are unsuccessful, you don't deserve anything' will increase the pressure on the child.
-Good grades should not be exaggeratedly praised. 'Congratulations, you did a great job. 'We can celebrate if you want.' will be enough.
-Celebrations and awards should not be exaggerated. Activities can be done together, such as having a meal together or going to the cinema. Of course, if you promised a report card gift before reading this article, you should keep your promise.
Dear parents, remember that children need to rest and have fun, even if they get bad grades. I wish you a nice holiday.
Read: 0
