We know that "focus and self-control" in children is one of the 7 basic life skills. Focus and Self-Control skills are related to the executive functions of the brain, and the development of the brain's executive functions continues until the early twenties. It is important to take this information into consideration in order to expect developmentally appropriate focus and self-control skills from children. A small child has two legs, and an adult has two legs. They both walk using their feet, but what they do and to what extent is affected by conditions such as leg lengths. We can think of the same situation for executive function skills, which include focus and self-control. It is possible to talk about an executive function skill when a small baby focuses on the spoon full of food that he will put into his mouth. If you, as a parent, are working on a project in a limited time and concentrate all your focus on the project, we are again talking about an executive function skill. However, it is a focus and self-control skill that functions in completely different areas depending on your development level. Ellen Galinsky offers various suggestions to support the development of focus and self-control skills in children.
1-Help babies and toddlers learn to control themselves.
For this, you will need to observe your baby/child and experiment based on your impressions to discover the most appropriate calming strategy for your child. A child who can stay calm and calm down can focus. Therefore, one of your priorities is to monitor your child's temperament and reactions and provide him with the most appropriate calming strategy. 2- Incorporate these skills into daily activities and games.
Although modern culture seems to have largely separated play and learning, play and learning are actually an inseparable whole. Like many things you want your child to learn, you can support these skills by observing and including them in daily mind and games.
3- Direct children to activities that they can focus on and follow according to their interests.
Working on interests improves focus and self-control. For example, last summer A few perfume-enthusiastic girls from our living room collected flowers, tried to produce scents with their own means, and tried to sell these scents to passers-by on the street. I am sure that many executive function skills such as discovery of interests, planning of the process leading to the goal, self-control, and focusing on the process and production have developed in this process. 4- Play games with children that require their attention.
Games such as chair grab, puzzles, guessing games and riddles can be given as examples. The game of red light and green light can also be given as an example. Games with a condition such as "Stop when you see a red light, go when you see a green light" ensure that children have to focus on certain stimuli while playing. They have to be attentive to stay in the game and not be disqualified.
5-Read stories to children in a way that encourages them to listen. Listening games encourage focus, recall and inhibitory control. While reading a story, stopping at a part of the sentence and asking the child to guess the sentence to complete it, or encouraging the child to sing a story he has just listened to like a song, requires the child to stay focused throughout the listening period and to remember what he heard when he is finished. This also enables the child to develop inhibitory control against other stimuli that will prevent him from focusing and remembering.
6- If you are going to choose computer games and television programs for your child, consider the options recommended by experts as they increase attention. If you want to avoid exposing the child to the screen for the first 36 months and then include the screen in your daily life, you should choose content that will be beneficial for limited periods of time and development.
7-Make sure that there is no television or other digital content on for adults in the environment.
Researchers state that adult programs running in the background also affect the time children focus on their games.
8- Play matching games with changing rules to improve cognitive flexibility. For example, ask the child to first sort the toys in a basket filled with small legos of mixed colors and sizes according to colors. We can say � to wait, then change the instruction and wait for it to separate them according to their sizes. Reorganizing oneself according to expectation is the skill of cognitive flexibility. However, here you need to consider your child's development level.
9- To develop cognitive flexibility, play pretend games with children, encourage them to play roles and make up stories.
Role-playing, making up stories, playing symbolic games are indicators of cognitive flexibility. It is very important to encourage these capacities of the child in your daily routine and games.
10- Encourage the child to play games with rules, where the child must keep the instructions in mind.
"Simon says" can be cited as an example of this type of game. Like "Simon says touch your mouth and then your nose"... Of course, you need to take into account your child's level of development in areas such as auditory attention.
11- To improve working memory, encourage your children to make plans, follow these plans, and then talk about these plans. It is also possible to use visuals for this. For example, it can be a good activity to plan your day by hanging small pictures of what you will do throughout the day on a daily flow board and chat about the things you planned and did in the evening. Of course, for this, you will need to prepare a playful daily flow board and visuals with your child.
12- In order to develop inhibition control, play games that will prevent the child from going on autopilot and keep his attention alert.
Games such as camel and dwarf, day and night can be counted among these types of games. While playing games where he/she will have to do the opposite of what he hears, he will not be able to switch to autopilot because he will not only pay attention to the instructions but will try to do the opposite by reinterpreting what he heard in his mind.
13- Make sure your child is well rested and fit. After all, it would be unfair to expect a child who has not listened and is not fit enough to keep his attention alert and to regulate himself.
14- Apply focus and self-control in your own life and try to improve it. ray.
Children learn best by modeling. Developing and applying these skills in yourself will contribute positively to your development, as well as to your child's. Thus, with your efforts and attitudes, you will create a positive and consistent role model for your child.
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