You are afraid to be like yourself, you are criticized for being like yourself, you hear maybe ten times more from him when you bring any criticism,
Is it me wrong?
Are we living in the same relationship? ?
If your conversations turn into moments of meeting where you come together to be happy but are tired of pretending, then;
Perhaps you are in a toxic relationship or have lived at some point in your life.
Toxic relationship, by definition, is a relationship that makes us feel worthless in which we cannot find meaning and well-being that makes us feel bad.
The state of not being like ourselves in that relationship is actually a toxic relationship.
I believe so much that I will not be loved by myself and my personality that I cannot say the things I want, the jokes I want, the things I want.
I can't speak what I want, I can't wear what I want.
Before this relationship, when I was someone who defended certain feelings with certain values, in this relationship, the things that I formed my self with disappear.
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“Are you sad about this or laughing about it?
Do you believe these?
How do you get that?
You shouldn't talk to those people, they're not good for you.“ I hear sentences like
I can't believe what I'm seeing anymore.
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The other person questions so much that I also start to question it.
The person in front of me does not support the decisions I make in life and even hinders them.
In healthy relationships, we respect each other's decisions, we believe that each other is competent to make a decision.
In a toxic relationship, the two parties do not trust each other in this sense, they do not believe that they can make decisions.
People make mocking and humiliating sentences during the discussion in a toxic relationship, we can't see any respectful gestures in any of the discussions. In fact, this style of communication becomes not only in the discussion, but also in the whole relationship in general.
Partners also stop respecting each other's values.
In healthy relationships, each other we respect your values
That didn't mean What is important to him will be important to me sometimes may not be to us and it is normal within these limits, but disrespect is one step beyond that.
We underestimate the importance and value of the other person.
So what can we do if both parties are showing toxic behaviors in the relationship?
If the partners sit down and say that I have done these and these things and I want to change them
then something can be started again.
If the answer to the question, "Am I ready to invest time in this relationship and do something to improve this relationship, is yes for both parties, then progress can be made?"
It is very important that both parties take action to discover behaviors that trigger each other without blaming each other.
What triggers us to display toxic behaviors.
What am I doing to make you feel inadequate?
What am I doing that makes you feel unheard of?
partners should be able to seek answers to their questions.
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