Jealousy is a natural instinctive emotion. Sibling jealousy; It consists of a combination of thoughts of sadness, fear of humiliation and anger, as well as contradictory emotions such as love, protection and closeness. It arises from the child's difficulty in accepting that he has to share his parents with a new person. All the care and attention that was on him is now on his brother. During this period, the child feels insecure and unsupported. He thinks that he is no longer loved, he is not the chirpy child he used to be. He does not eat and has aggressive behavior towards himself and objects. He constantly asks his parents if they love him. He thinks that they don't love him as much as they used to. He tries to attract attention by making excuses that he is afraid and that he needs to go to the toilet. He may regress to the previous developmental stage with behaviors such as wetting the bed and sucking his thumb, or he may seem to love his sibling in order not to make his mother move away from him completely. Can make exaggerated displays of affection. This situation occurs with behaviors that reveal underlying emotions. He squeezes your cheek a little too hard while caressing it. He embraces his brother until it hurts him. He accidentally drops it on the floor.
What Should Be Done?
Release Your Anxiety: The first thing you need to do is to relax. Since children are affected by the behavior of the adults around them, your concerns about how he will treat his sibling will make him more nervous.
Talk to Him: Before his sibling is born, remember that a new person will come to the family, so your house will be more crowded and crowded from time to time. You should explain to him that he may be more excited than usual and that you may have to spend more time with him because he is small and in need of help. You need to support not only with words but also with your actions that your love for your sibling does not decrease after he is born.
Do the Things He Used to Enjoy After His Sibling Was Born: For example; If you were reading books before your sibling was born, do not stop doing so suddenly after birth. In this way, the child will realize that he has not lost his status and will not lose his self-confidence.
Do not take him away from his brother. a Do not try: Trying to take the child away from the baby by being overly anxious is one of the biggest mistakes that can be made. Being overly tolerant to make sure he doesn't get jealous will only worsen the situation. It should be clearly explained that he is not allowed to harm the baby.
Ask Him for Help and Sometimes Permission: He will enjoy having his sibling help with his little needs and it will make him think that he is useful and cared about. Ask for permission to give your sibling small clothes or toys. Giving one's belongings to a sibling without permission may upset the child and may also fuel his/her jealousy.
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