What is the Need for Social Approval?
The family we were born and raised in is a structure that affects people in many ways. The first environment in which people's personality and attitudes towards their environment are formed is the family structure.
Family structure is different in the form of nuclear and extended families. Personality attitudes that occur in individuals who grow up in different family structures can sometimes emerge as a need for social approval.
We see the Family, the smallest building block of society, as an institution from the moment Mankind took its place on the world stage.
However, in the changing time period and with the changing conditions, the family structure, like everything else, keeps up with change and development.
The transformation of the extended family structure into the nuclear family type is at the forefront of these changes
So, What is Family?
There are many definitions of family, culture and community. According to (Gladding; 2015); The family is a union of individuals who have historical, emotional and psychological ties among themselves, and who feel themselves to be members of the same house. In the current Turkish dictionary of the Turkish Language Institution (2018), Family Definition; It is expressed as the smallest union in the society formed by the relations between Husband and Wife, Children and Siblings based on Marriage and Blood ties.
In the communities that exist on earth, each society has its own family types.
Nuclear families; Spouses who are not ready to take on extra responsibilities in such families because they are weaker, lonely, deprived of support and defenseless compared to the extended family, are likely to have role conflicts from time to time and some problems may arise between them (Yörükoğlu, 2007, p. 49). One of these problems is the upbringing of individuals in need of Social Approval in Families that lack support and are in a vulnerable situation.
What is this Social Approval that deeply affects people and makes their lives dependent on others?
This situation, which we express as social approval, but which we are not far from by our society, is actually "What does the real world say?" or known as "El Alemcilik". This situation is not based on the self-respect and self-worth of the person, but the praise, appreciation and appreciation of the environment and the environment. It is formed according to the e-approval.
When a person cannot get enough Love, Interest and Approval, that is, the feeling of self-acceptance, in the environment in which he grew up, he prioritizes the expectations of others by acting contrary to his own self-esteem and self-values in order to fill and complete this deficiency. Since he does not say "No" to all requests of those around him, he cannot set a limit for himself. In short, what do others say? He answers his question with his own anxiety. The society we live in affects the behavior of individuals in a significant way. Even “What does Al Âlam say?” The question is a question pattern that is so settled in the Subconscious/Unconscious of individuals that the individual's life style, the moment of decision, "What does the El Âlam say?" adjusts to the question. As such, our appearance, the way we speak, our preferences are mostly our behaviors determined by the need for social approval. Therefore, the existence and problem of the need for Social Approval in every segment of society and in every moment of life manifests itself.
Social approval can be framed as the need to be accepted by society and to conform to the ideas of those around the individual.
Individuals with a high need for Social Approval; It is a state of concern in the evaluation of his behavior by his surroundings in the light of his core values, who cannot reject anything, Cannot draw boundaries, can exhibit all kinds of behavior even if it is wrong just to gain approval, and tries to keep up with every move of the society he is in in order to leave a positive mark around him and get approval.
These individuals do not want them to get worse with others. Therefore, they try to prevent hostility and criticism (Karaşar; 2014). If you have;
- It is important to me that my thoughts are approved by others.
- I strive to be liked and appreciated.
- I pay attention to people's facial expressions to see if I am approved.
- I try to highlight my positive aspects.
- If a person has a negative attitude towards me, I try to make that person's attitude positive.
- Negative I hide my feelings for fear of not being approved.
- I give up on my own wishes by thinking about what others will say.
- I refrain from challenging views that are accepted by the majority, even if I believe it is not true.
- I get hurt when others evaluate me negatively.
- I feel worthless when I am not approved by others.
- If you say that I find it difficult to start a business without consulting others, or the more you answer YES to these items, I can tell you that your need for support is urgent.
Individuals with this type of anxiety are assisted in resolving their Social Approval Anxiety in line with the Cognitive Behavioral (CBT) approach and reframing method by identifying the source of the Problem.
With Individually Awareness and Wishes for a Healthy Life...
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