In my previous article, I mentioned that instead of the emotions that cause us pain, our reactions to these emotions increase our suffering and cause suffering. The secondary pain/suffering that occurs as a result of our reaction to the main feelings, emotions and pain that cause us pain is almost always accompanied by physical tension. Closing ourselves against the pain, resisting it, holding our breath, that is, trying to prevent the pain from coming into contact with us, understandably results in a physical contraction.
With the help of conscious awareness practices, we see that this second closing response is not mandatory and is our choice. It is possible. You do not have to live with the physical tension caused by this closure.
We can soften by learning to open ourselves to existing emotions, be in the moment, return to the moment, return to the body and breath. We can make a place in our hearts for these emotions and learn to exist in the same body. Most of the time, we want difficult emotions to leave us as quickly as possible. However, trying to get rid of them is like wasting time, because this part is not under our control. On the contrary, this effort of ours often results in an increase in the intensity of these unwanted emotions and more tension.
With the change in this push response we give to these emotions, physical tension begins to dissolve. Our emotions can only find space to move and transform when we can stay with them as long as necessary with compassionate awareness.
In our conscious awareness practices, we first learn to accept the primary pain and the physical sensations that accompany it. We experience painful feelings, resistance, and softening of response. In this way, we prevent these feelings from turning into suffering. I'm not talking about eliminating pain, anxiety, and pain here. However, we can ensure that the distress and suffering that surrounds them is resolved and softened. And that makes life worth living
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