People may use negative words when they are angry, when they succumb to their anger, when they get angry, when they are tense or when they experience frustration. These words are called swear words. Swear; Sometimes it is said using curse words, sometimes words of sexual content, and sometimes words containing animal names. The adult aims to offend the other person or to get rid of his/her anger with these words he uses. But the situation is slightly different for children. Most of the time, unpleasant things that the child does not know the meaning of; He/she may use these words, which we adults call swearing, to attract attention or to imitate an adult role model. Of course, if precautions are not taken when the child is young, deliberate utterance will occur as the child grows older.
Of course, an adult does not want the child to speak profanely. However, it may indirectly cause the child to learn or reinforce these words. If the parent laughs or gives the child's desired reaction when the child imitates the swearing he heard from his parent, this situation will of course be reinforced in the child. Again, I can indirectly say that the way of learning is that when the parent is angry, he/she speaks profanity in a way that the child can hear and allows the child to learn by hearing it. Let's not forget that children learn the most from their parents.
Every child needs to attract attention. However, the desire to attract attention is greater in children who cannot receive attention. Sometimes, if a child uses swear words or sentences learned from outside at home and receives a reaction from his/her parents, this behavior is reinforced. Because this is how it managed to attract attention. And the process of attracting attention, which begins in this way, reinforces negative behavior and causes conflicts between parents and children at home, and becomes a means of attracting attention for the child. How sad it is that the child who swears has begun to be noticed...
By the way, it is useful to remind this. A child is like a camera or a recorder. He attracts what he sees and hears. In other words, a child whose parent speaks profanely has no choice, but the parent may not realize it and complain about the child's abusive language.
WHAT ARE THE CAUSES OF SCUPHITY IN CHILDREN?
Every child gets stressed from time to time. lives. Raised in a child's world This situation causes stress. This stress is in the child; swearing, aggression, loss of appetite, stubbornness, hitting, etc. manifests itself through behavior. At such times, the child should be calmed down and allowed to talk. This stress he experiences should be resolved with parental support and attention. We witness that some children swear frequently. If a child who learns life through imitation and modeling swears, the reasons should be examined and precautions should be taken. If we look at the reasons for swearing in children; >
Anger or feeling of revenge against the oppressive-authoritarian parent
Lack of parent-child communication
Feeling of inadequacy
Constantly setting limits for the child
Academic failure
Strict family rules
Exposure of the child to sensory and physical abuse
Giving the child responsibilities that he cannot handle
p>Experiencing blurting out in situations of anger and rage (this is seen at times of tension in the family due to the presence of abusive parents or excessive frustration)
Desire to be accepted among peers who swear efforts to feel the need or to accept one's independence One should be a positive model for the child. It should not be forgotten that if the parent swears, there is no possibility of the child not swearing too
The child should be given the opportunity to express his/her anger or hurt feelings towards the parent, if any. Being able to express his emotions will prevent him from resorting to swearing words when he is angry.
When the child uses swear words, violence or threats should never be used, and sudden and exaggerated reactions should be avoided. If the child swears, the child's attention should be diverted to another direction.
When the child swears, approach him with a harsh tone and scare him; It will suppress that behavior in the child, not cause it to disappear.
The parent should act in a controlled manner when angry, and the child should be taught how to express his/her anger more positively. In other words, it should be ensured that the child learns to use appropriate and acceptable words instead of swear words. The child should be directed to activities such as painting, music, poetry and sports
The parent should show interest and love to the child. The child wants to feel cared for or appreciated. The most effective medicine for adaptation and behavioral problems in children is attention and love.
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