We know that the father is the other person as important as the mother in the child's life, but in general terms, we see that under the sentences such as fathers' business life and other responsibilities, a broken bond between the father and the child is formed. This bond does not only mean deprivation of father's love and attention; It takes place in every aspect of the child's life in different ways. It is quite possible for them to turn into children who are excluded by their friends at school, who have difficulty expressing themselves, who have problems in their classes, who have problematic or weak relationships, who have poor communication skills, who are angry and violent. While families generally focus on the school, teacher or upbringing style in such problems, they primarily think less of the relationship and bond established with the mother and father.
Where the mother's voice is louder, where common decisions and rules cannot be made for the child, or Many problems often manifest themselves in other forms in children who spend more time with their mothers. Where and how the father's absence manifests itself may vary depending on each child. However, the most realistic result is that it negatively affects the child's life. First of all, at the very basis of the relationship between the child and the father; The relationship between mother and father must be healthy. Your child also needs to be involved in this relationship and observe these things. The most important environment that the child should witness in a home is how much the father and mother communicate, how cooperative they are or how loving and respectful they are to each other, how problems are solved at home, how the address, attitude and communication takes place between the parents. This is how it is formed. In order for the child to establish a secure bond, a balance must be achieved in the relationship between the parents. This balance should not consist of a relationship that is either overdosing, too involved and oppressive with the child, or indifferent and cold. Situations such as the mother taking full care or responsibility of the child are not beneficial for both the mother and the child, on the contrary, they are harmful.
The mother's involvement in every aspect of the child's work makes the child feel anxiety, insecurity and pressure; The mother's dedication to the child is not a healthy situation in itself. While the father figure is the side of strength and courage for the child, the mother figure is the side of compassion and trust. Therefore, a child needs both. There is pain. The mother's stealing a role from the father or her extra attention to the child will not bring positive feedback. The child always needs his mother and father for his emotional, social and cognitive development. Meeting this need with a single parent, being both a mother and a father, does not represent a skill, on the contrary, it represents a deficiency in the child's life. The situation of fathers, I work for my family and I get tired, should not be a reason. If you cannot communicate with your child for at least 30 minutes every day (healthy communication, especially dealing with the child without the phone or television), this may turn into a family problem. We must not forget that every child needs his father and a healthy relationship with his father as much as his mother. The best thing you can give to your child; is to make time for it.
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