One of the most important features that distinguishes an individual from other living things is the ability to establish and maintain relationships with others in order to meet their basic needs such as nutrition, protection and belonging. From the moment a person is born, he first comes into contact with the person who cares for him in order to meet his basic needs. This relationship that individuals develop with their mother or caregiver in the first years of life is explained by the concept of attachment. Attachment is defined as the strong emotional bonds that individuals develop with the primary caregiver formed in early childhood (Bowlby, 1982). It is stated that attachment in early childhood creates a bridge between childhood and adulthood. Individuals internalize the sense of trust they have developed with their caregivers and act according to these mental representations in their relationships with others. The quality of individuals' attachment behavior affects their expectations, needs and behaviors in the relationships they will establish in adulthood. Romantic relationships are one of the dynamics that meet both emotional and physical needs of individuals, along with relationship patterns such as family relationships and friendships. Romantic relationships are expressed as a form of attachment in which individuals complement each other, based on love and affection, and where many needs such as mutual trust, intimacy, equality, and commitment are met. Marriage is a system of relationships between a romantic relationship in which a man and a woman legally come together to form a family. The marital relationship is closely related to attachment styles. Attachment styles are transferred to people who are responsible for meeting their basic needs in early childhood, and if peers and spouses perform similar processes in adulthood. Attachment in children is one-sided, whereas in adults it is based on mutual interaction. While the need for attention and love is met in children, mutual love and trust come to the fore in adults. The attachment process in adult romantic relationships is twofold. Both parties become the ones who both give and receive care and support when needed. Adult attachment In order for the process to be two-way, the partners must have common goals. Spouses' support for each other creates a safe harbor. Close relationships in adults can be explained on the basis of attachment theory. In adulthood, spouses take place as attachment figures, therefore attachment styles play a role in shaping emotions and thoughts between spouses. Relationship dynamics that individuals establish with their spouses differ according to their attachment styles. Hazan and Shaver (1987) grouped adult attachment styles into three groups as avoidant, anxious/ambivalent, and secure. It is stated that individuals with a secure attachment style feel happier and safer in their marital relationships, and individuals with an anxious attachment style are constantly in a relationship with ups and downs. It is stated that individuals with avoidant attachment keep love at arm's length because they are afraid of intimacy.
How Does Secure Attachment Style Affect Marriage Relationship?
Individuals who are in close relationship with their families in childhood have a secure attachment and can meet their needs in adulthood. It is stated that they feel safe because they see them in the location. An acceptable intimacy with the baby's caregiver provides him with a secure base. This situation creates the perception that the child feels the presence of someone he can trust when he needs it, and that he is not alone. Securely attached spouses support each other and create a safe space in the relationship. Couples who are in a long-term and harmonious marital relationship are those with a secure attachment style. It is stated that in marriages where both spouses have a secure attachment style, marriages are evaluated more positively, the spouses are close and the conflict between them is less. It is observed that individuals with secure attachment are satisfied with their marital relationships because they can express their love easily. Securely attached spouses are in solidarity among themselves, trust each other, their commitment to their relationships and the satisfaction they get from the relationship are higher.
How Does Anxious Attachment Style Affect the Marriage Relationship?
Those with anxious-ambivalent attachment have problems with themselves and with the relationship. These individuals experience constant anxiety and do not consider themselves worthy of being loved. They need a lot of support, which causes them to develop dependent personality traits. Those with an anxious attachment style, on the other hand, have ambivalent feelings about intimacy. She experiences constant emotional ups and downs. Anxious individuals in a marital relationship are worried about whether their spouse, whom they are always on the alert for, loves them or not, and whether they really want to stay with him. They quickly notice even the smallest threat, exaggerating negative situations. Individuals with anxious attachment have a strong desire to maintain intimacy in their relationships. Since these individuals organize their sense of trust within the framework of "control", they provide self-confidence when their spouse responds positively to them, and they think that they have been betrayed when they go out of control. It does not allow the independence of the spouses, shows excessive jealousy and passion, and these behaviors cause conflict in the relationship. They experience intense anxiety about whether their partner is suitable for them and whether they can meet their needs. It is stated that individuals with an anxious attachment style have low levels of satisfaction in their marital relationships and that their relationships end in separation because they experience dissatisfaction in their relationships. Although they want to have a close relationship, the insecurities and fears they have experienced prevent this desire from being realized.
How Does Avoidant Attachment Style Affect the Marriage Relationship?
Those with an avoidant attachment style have trouble establishing close relationships with another person. They have difficulty trusting and connecting with their partners. They are introverted and cold, avoid expressing their feelings. He is not very interested in solving the problems that arise within the marriage. They are not aware of their spouse's needs and troubles, and are uneasy in the face of their spouse's desire to be close. There is a distance between him and his wife� he wants it. He prioritizes his work and hobbies more than his relationship. Marriage expectations are low. He prefers to be self-sufficient. Avoids conflict or reacts with resentment. It is stated that individuals with avoidant attachment style have low satisfaction with their marriage.
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