Due to our social habits, our children are generally raised in foster family structures. Mothers do everything for their children, compensate for all their mistakes, and find a solution whenever they are in trouble. As long as their children study and do not get tired by doing anything else. The foster family structure will not be able to impose any responsibility on its child. Parents have already made it their duty to be a solution by taking care of all the needs of their children.
The duty or responsibility of the children is to study. But after all this, the child either adopts it or does not. Because in that case, mothers get worried if they have homework instead of their children, and they worry if they have exams. Well, there isn't much left for the child to do. There is no need for another person to make an effort when someone is there. One person is enough, and it is already increasing, and thus children grow up without taking any responsibility.
In fact, they have a habit of not taking responsibility and not taking the blame for the mistakes they make. Again, this is something that is given since childhood and then the child grows up. Thus, people emerge who do not look for the blame within themselves, who look for the factors that cause the crime outside, who always attribute blame to the other party, who act without thinking, who do not see the consequences of their actions, who always avoid their share of responsibility, and who act as if what happened is not their problem or responsibility.
This situation becomes clearer with adolescence and begins to appear as a problem. Egocentricity is at the forefront during adolescence. The adolescent sees himself at the center of all events. In adolescence, there is always “I”. He acts without thinking. The adolescent, who is already confused, may not be able to predict the consequences of events. Of course, at this point, how one is raised also becomes important. A child who grows up at home being constantly flattered, cherished, given no responsibility, and doing whatever he wants, begins to see the whole outside world as if it were against him, with the natural characteristics of adolescence. He constantly has problems with his friends. He is always on good terms with his teachers. Never sees his own mistakes, constantly contradicts himself blames the party. He doesn't know the rules. He always wants his wishes to be done. He always believes in the truth of what he says.
Of course, in this case, if the family cannot be objective and still has a protective family attitude, they will accept everything their children say as absolutely true. He does not feel the need to investigate the events.
Events like these happen most of the time. The child was so pampered at home that everything he wanted was done; He gets disappointed very easily outside. Because not everyone tries to make him happy outside like at home and does not tolerate his mistakes. But the child is so used to this at home that he thinks this is normal, and he either becomes withdrawn with disappointment, or the room starts to go the other way.
By behaving like this, he solves their problems instead of our children, and does not give them the opportunity to improve themselves. We become.We both solve their problems and complain about them on their behalf. Because he cannot solve any of his problems and cannot see the results. We don't give opportunities since childhood. If they encounter a problem at school, whether with their friends or with their teachers, we immediately rush to school. Instead, we try to solve the problem. Then we ask why this child cannot solve the problems he encounters or make decisions on his own.
As a result, it is very easy to blame and criticize someone. The difficult thing is to criticize ourselves. It means being able to see our mistakes. It means accepting our share in every situation. This is what makes a person mature. If we can do this, we will be a healthy person and live in harmony with our environment. This is what gives us so much; improving us.If we want our children to be like this, we must start the change from ourselves.If we act maturely, we can be a good model for them.
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