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Fear of School (School Phobia)
School phobia is the child's refusal or seeming unwilling to go to school due to strong anxiety. The most frequently described anxiety-related thoughts by children are: "If the teacher gets angry and punishes me, if the students hurt me, if they kidnap me at school, if something happens to my mother while I'm at school, if my family doesn't leave me at school, etc." We can give an example. The anxiety of children with school phobia may begin before going to bed and continue until after school hours the next day. Anxious thoughts are often accompanied by difficulty sleeping, loss of appetite, irritability, crying behavior and physical symptoms (such as abdominal pain, nausea, headache, vomiting). Families often express that they feel relieved when it comes to school dismissal time and it is clear that their children will not go to school that day. The disappearance of physical symptoms and problems on weekends or when the need to go to school disappears may cause families to mistakenly think that "the child does not have a mental problem, he is doing it on purpose."
Which children are most likely to experience school phobia? ?
Those that increase the possibility of school fear in children:
An only child,
A child with difficulty acquired (in vitro fertilization, etc.),
Being the only or first grandchild,
Child with a perfectionist, anxious, obsessive temperament,
Being the only son or daughter in the family,
Frequent or A child who has a life-threatening illness,
A child who grew up in an overly protective family,
A child who has difficulty separating from his/her mother,
A child whose parents have anxiety disorders,
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Conflicts within the family,
Having a sick family member.
When does the fear of school begin?
Going to school It is common when starting out, changing classes or schools, and returning from vacation. The birth of a sibling, a change of home and environment, a new serious illness in the family, the death of someone in the family, arguments within the family, peer bullying at school, humiliating-frightening experiences at school may trigger school fear.
How to treat fear of school?
Cognitive behavioral therapy for the family and child. If necessary, anti-anxiety medications are used. It is solved with the close cooperation of the child psychiatrist, family, child and teachers.
Suggestions for families of children with school fear:
- If the child has physical complaints, take him/her to the doctor. .
- Contact the classroom teacher and guidance counselor.
- Stay cool and calm. If you have difficulty controlling your anger, step back during a crisis and let someone else manage the crisis.
- Try not to express your negative thoughts and observations about the school and your teacher in the environment where the child is present.
- Contact the school administration or teachers. Do not reflect the communication problem to the child, try to keep the child away from these conflicts and arguments.
- Understand the child. Try to understand the problem and its source.
- Encourage the child to share his fears and expectations from you.
- If the child cannot identify the reason for not wanting to go to school or does not want to talk, do not force it. When you force it too much, you may cause the teacher to give unrealistic reasons about his friends, lessons, or his life at school.
- Express that school fear can also be seen in other children and that there is a solution.
- Consider the school we lived in in our childhood. You can tell about the concerns and difficulties you experienced, how you coped with the problem and our positive memories.
- Express the gains that the child will gain when he continues school, such as new friends and new information.
- Always help the child solve the problem. Make him/her feel that you will support him or her.
- Do not get angry at the child for not going to school, do not threaten him, do not make fun of him, do not use verbal or physical violence.
- Refuse your attitudes (protective attitude) that cause the emergence of school fear or the continuation of the problem.
- It will be useful to reduce the child's fears, help the child feel safe, what to do in case of emergency, who can get help, etc. Give information about the issues.
- Be insistent and determined that he/she attends school regularly. If you cannot act consistently and decisively, you can get support from other family members.
- Do not try to pick up the child from school, delay the start of school, or take a break, which will cause the fear of school to continue. Thoughts such as "Don't let it go for a while, it will pass" worsen the problem.
- If the reason for the child's fear of school is related to the anxiety of separation from you, changing schools and teachers will not help, on the contrary, it will make adaptation difficult.
- Until the child's fears decrease, you can accompany the child in the classroom to make him/her feel safe. When his/her anxiety increases, you can wait at a point in the school where he can see you and accompany him to and from school.
- The duration of the child's stay at school can be increased gradually.
- Dropping the child to school and walking away when he is not ready to stay at school without you will cause the child's fear to increase.
- Determine the path to be followed together with the child psychiatrist, the child and his teacher until he overcomes his fear of school. Stick to the plan, be sure to inform the child if any changes will be made in the plan.
- Appreciate and reward the child for his efforts and success at every stage in overcoming his fear of school.
- The reason for his fear of school is related to separation from the family. If there is anxiety, give the child information about where you will go and how long you will stay when leaving school.
Suggestions for teachers for school fear;
- Help from the school guidance service.
- Try to understand the child's concerns.
- Try to determine the reason for the child's fear of school (peer pressure, ridicule, failure in academic and social skills, family's attitude). Help the child and the family with the solution.
- Help the child feel safe at school by increasing physical and emotional contact.
- Intimidation, threat, anger, shouting, humiliation, hurting and Avoid behaviors such as comparison.
- Do not interpret the child's fear as coyness, lying or spoiledness. Because the child is really afraid and cannot cope.
- Encourage the child to participate in classroom activities, do not force him. When giving tasks to the child, start with activities that the child can handle and enjoy, and at the end, appreciate and congratulate him.
- By encouraging the child to do common activities with his friends, Make him/her feel belonging to the class.
- Exchange ideas with the guidance service and child psychiatrist about school fear and what needs to be done.
- Try to follow the plan suggested by the guidance service or psychiatrist. Give the mother or father the opportunity to accompany the child for a certain period of time.
- Try to keep the child at school, sending the child home may cause the problem to become chronic.
- Mothers and fathers may be anxious and tense due to their children's fear of school. Avoid conflict with family, taking into account Try not to reflect the arguments and communication problems with the family to the child.
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