Love has an intoxicating effect on us, and understanding this mysterious effect from a scientific perspective can help us navigate relationships a little more clearly. Meditation, self-awareness, and good communication skills are crucial to having a successful relationship, but the biological factors of attachment and separation can challenge even those with very high levels of self-development. Over thousands of years, nature has agreed to develop complex neurological drives that fundamentally form our desire for connection, and this internal process begins to be reflected externally when we interact socially with the people around us. While we may never fully understand the inner workings of this process, science can shed some light on what's going on.
“Falling in love releases a flood of feel-good chemicals that trigger certain physical reactions in our bodies. This inner love potion is responsible for the flushing of our cheeks, the sweatiness of our palms, and the racing of our hearts.” Pat Mumby, PhD, Science Daily
Everybody's Playing Dumb (!)
Let's start from the beginning…Love is beautiful, but it can also be addictive; It can lead us to do and say crazy things. I think we all know what it's like to "melt" or "get lost" and "lose yourself" in a moment of passion with a lover or very close friend. There is a special part of our brain to “thank” these feelings: The Amygdala! It has a very important and useful function when it does not help us calm down. If there are no songs to guide us; I hope we all have the ability to laugh at ourselves and each other through these outbursts.
The amygdala has the ability to put our brains in “fight or flight” mode. This ability comes from our prehistoric past when we hunted in the wild. Our brains needed a way to bypass the higher thinking centers when we needed immediate reaction to survive life or death situations. The amygdala is thus given special power to override or bypass the more responsible parts of ourselves. When we are emotionally “triggered,” it is purely a reaction of our amygdala to detect some kind of danger. Identifying this reaction, pausing it, and what to do Having the ability to use a fez can do wonders for helping us come back to our senses during heated moments.
“Romantic love and maternal love are extremely valuable experiences. Both are linked to species maintenance and therefore have proximate biological functions of critical evolutionary importance. Examining the neural correlates of newly developed subjective states with brain imaging techniques has enabled neurobiologists to learn something about the neural underpinnings of both romantic love and maternal love. “Both types of binding activate regions unique to each, as well as regions of the brain that overlap with areas rich in oxytocin and vasopressin receptors in the reward system.”
We are manipulated by a neurochemical cocktail prepared in our brains associated with sexual drive, attachment and mate preference. The ingredients in this cocktail are the essence of productivity for our species; Their biological lives are older than our current lives, and they will continue to be transmitted at an accelerated rate after we are gone. However, love, sex, relationships are not just for procreation; they are also essential for health, personal development and mental health.
Neurochemical; It is a broad term that includes neuropeptides and neurotransmitters. Neurotransmitters are chemicals that enable neurotransmission by transmitting signals across a chemical synapse. Neuropeptides are small protein-like molecules used by neurons to communicate with each other. Generally speaking, the main players in this chemical drama include; testosterone and estrogen, which are related to sexual drive; dopamine, which is involved in pleasure, addiction, and reward; Most commonly called the “love hormone,” oxytocin is associated with attachment and belonging – it also (along withvasopressin) plays an important role in partner preference.
“Couples often show signs of increased dopamine: increased energy, less need for sleep or food, focused attention and exquisite pleasure in the smallest details of the most remarkable relationship!”
Interaction is Not Just in Your Head…
According to the leading theories developed by experts; our nervous systems It is not self-sufficient, but clearly interacts with those around us and those we are closest to. This hypothesis is called “limbic resonance”. This hypothesis; It is the biological explanation for the symphony of deeply shared emotions that occur when we synchronize with each other in a way that has profound effects on personality and lifelong emotional health. This phenomenon is not unique to humans, it is also known and exists among other mammals and species.
Putting the Pieces
So now we have science that confirms just how complex and unpredictable love and relationships can be. What this gives us is the ability to begin to distinguish what triggers biological needs. When we act like an addict regarding love, we feel the need for a hug to satisfy our need for connection (getting the idea of oxytocin), but if we have too much testosterone or estrogen, we may end up looking for opportunities for sexual pleasure.
Sex can lead to deeper attachment, which can create a chemical addiction to the kinds of drama that cause us to “lose ourselves” just as our amygdala senses danger (loss, facing our own shadow). This perpetual cycle eventually brings us back to the basic spiritual principles and practices of letting go, forgiveness, and compassion, as well as spiritual, unconditional love for self and other. Sometimes even separation from a loved one can be a powerful and transformative part of your personal growth.
This endless investigation into the depths of human nature continues to illuminate the magnificence of our social life as humans. We all experience the highs and lows of relationships, and so much of the music and art we admire is born from the longing, confusion, and pleasure of these feelings. Knowing this; Research, Discover, Love Freely and Let It Go! Because; We are here to live and grow, not to suffer and crawl…
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