Nothing is completely resolved. It comes together, then falls apart. It comes together again and falls apart again. Life is just like that. Healing comes as you make room inside for all of this to happen; Space for mourning, for relief, for pain, for joy...
Pema Chödrön
Life is the balance between holding on and letting go... to every change, uncertainty, unwanted and most importantly pain that life brings. When you open a place in your heart and can look at the life in front of you and smile, things really change. Whatever we resist, don't want, or push away continues, but when we accept and embrace what exists, we add value to our lives. While we hold on to our dreams and beliefs that we will be okay, we become free as long as we let go of what we cannot control.
I'm not talking about passive surrender, submission to fate, or giving up here. I have said before that we cannot control the emergence of emotions that cause us pain and sadness. On the other hand, we can control how we receive them, our attitude towards them, and thus change how we experience these emotions. We can have a say in its effects on our lives. And this is really important! Focusing on what we can control while stopping to struggle with what we cannot control is one of the most important decisions that takes us from despair to hope. The first step is to accept the reality of the pain. We can realize that there is pain in life, and that most things that cause us pain are essentially stress and anxiety that come from trying to control what is temporary and uncontrollable. Trying to control the moment results in us feeling that what is happening should not be happening and thus results in struggle. Much of what causes heartache is because we want things to be different than they are. There are many things determined by our perspective on our lives and the journey we are on. And it is our mind, rather than the road itself, that determines whether we will have a rough or smooth journey.
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